sanga-sanga sa daan

actually, it's more like baradong daan. i found myself going down the jeep ride home to walk. as in, from provident vill to the bayan area where i live. pramis. but it's just a short walk for me, kasi sanay na ko sa walks lately, thanks to my renewed workout sked sa sports center at sa gym nearby.

trapik kasi ng sobrang hinayupak. as in, nagsalubong na ang mga sasakyan. sanga-sanga na nga ang lanes. ang reason: may shoot daw sa may marikina bridge. not sure lang kung film o tv, pero sabi ng miron andun daw si robin padilla. tangna. kaya lesson here students: ayusing mabuti ang coordination with local authorities kapag may shoot, para walang cause ng traffic. dapat yata ilagay yan sa lessons ng lahat ng production classes. hay... kaninong kasalanan yang trapik? sa PM? hay...

naalala ko tuloy yung isang kwento ni...forgot...about shooting in new york. na sa sobrang sanay na ng mga tao sa film shoots sa kalye dun, all you have to do is go to the nyfilm commission's office to get permits and they will be the ones to reroute traffic lang to follow your shoot sked location at no hassle sa motorists o pedestrians. tapos yung mga tao, lakad lakad lang na dedma kahit mag-roll ka na. panalo di ba? at professional. dito, kanina, ang una atang nanonood e yung taga-trapik dapat. kainis. gusto ko ngang batukan nung dumaan ako, kasi sobrang luwag lang sa bridge paglampas sa location shoot. buset.

*

di lang daan ang sanga-sanga tonight. utak ko rin. in anticipation lang siguro sa paghahalo ng balat sa tatalupan soon. as in, talagang may tatalupan ng buhay somewhere soon... shit hits the fan ito. i can't wait to see when it happens. and of course, i'll make it happen, man. hehe. la vendetta mode ito e bakit ba. ako si jean garcia. chos.

ang warfreak ko. pero kasi, this is war. whatever form of discrimination thrown towards me, be it with a sexist or homophobic venom, kelangang labanan. the antidote of conservative attacks is knowing your rights and wielding them as shields.

basta. abangan. abangan kung sino dapat ang ipinapako sa krus. hindi dapat si kristo kasi e. let him walk, man. let him walk.

like i said, wake up and smell the centennial.

*

kakagaling ko kasi sa preview ng OROSMAN AT ZAFIRA kaya ako ginabi. slight sanga-sanga ang thoughts ko sa play cum musicale na itey. based sa classic text ni balagtas of course, kaya i love the lyricism of the lines. classic talaga magsulat ang lolo mo.

yun nga lang... ewan. gawan ko ba ng review? parang di ko trip e. di ko masyado naging bet yung direction kasi, saka yung story handling. i know the text is difficult, pero bakit si shakespeare nagagawan ng paraan, inggles man o isinalin (mostly ni rolando tinio noon)? i am lost. as in, la-lost ako sa pagsunod ng naratibo. what happened to that dramaturgy team? hm, strange.

pinanood ko lang ito dahil sa colleage namin sa upfi ang gumawa ng original music, si carol. oks naman. neo-ethnic music sabi sa pr. hm, yun na pala ang tawag dun. magaling ang ensemble sa music. reliable naman sa sangay na ito ang lola mong iyon. pero ang nag-standout sa akin dito ay yung nag-portray ng zafira. si cris villongco ba yun? yung apo nina armida ito, right? coincidence, ang tito niya ay magtuturo sa institute next sem hihihi at super happy ako na napapayag namin siyang magturo. pero secret muna itey. kunwari. charot.

grabe i like the way this girl acted out the part. as in, she sings and acts and emotes from the gut, the skin, the heart, and her energy emanates from her center, yung mula sa solar plexus baga. and she releases it and you feel it. galeng, lalo na yung may emote iyak parts chenes tapos okay din siyang mag-movement dance chenes na choreo ni dexter santos. man, she is good! super! kaya dedma na sa ibang uninspired performances, mostly ng ilang menchu sa cast, at sa weird story handling. see it if only for her. bet siya pramis grabe.

hm, mukhang madaming magagaling na actors ang lumalabas lately sa teatro a. that's good naman. kaka-miss din manood ng maraming stage performances. although parang ayoko nang manood ng isang play sa guerrero kapag preview lang. unang dress tech performance pala yun, kaya libre for peyups faculty. next time, we catch the gala or regular runs na lang. i don't mind paying for theater tickets.

last note pala sa orosman. si tuxqs ang nag-pd. i like his attack. post-apocalyptic indigenous neo-ethnic. pramis, ganyan ang feel ng costumes at pd! katsa meets mesh stockings with a lotta bamboo and walis tingting. sankapa! you gotta see it to believe it. ilao battala lights yet again. i always like his work anyway. i like what they both did to the large convex dome thingie na nagiging moon tapos nagiging sun, na movable sa backdrop. da best. gusto ko ng ganun sa bahay hehe.

*

tuwa lang ako sa class ko kanina. at least itong batch na ito ay di nawala sa landas sa pagrereport ng topic nila. unlike last sems na biglang itatanong pa sa akin in the middle of their reports "tama ba, mam?" abah, isa lang sagot ko riyan "ewan ko. dapat alam mo yan." kainis lang yung ganun minsan, tatanungin ka kung tama ang report nila. kaya nga sila pinagrereport e. para matuto naman sila sa sarili nila, at ma-share nila ang info sa peers nila.

i remember dati pa, may nag-report tungkol sa censorship at mtrcb sa isang class. kada banggit niya ng data, isusunod niya ang "um, di ko alam bat naging ganyan, basta yun na." buset. gusto kong isigaw, nag-report ka pa! tangna talagang level ng katamaran ng iba minsan. minsan iniisip ko, sayang naman pang-tuition nila. dapat ibigay nila sa mas deserving but poorer student na mas may drive matuto kesa sa kanila. ang dami kong ganitong students kasi lately e. ewan.

wake up and smell the tuition fee increase.

*

kakatuwa lang. nagsasanga muli ang daan ng mga former UP Sappho peeps. like last friday, at the lunduyan launch, nagulat ako when i saw charm, our baby dyke before sa sappho circa 1998. as in super baby. pero now, lady of the world na ang lola mo. she bloomed. i'm so happy for her. kala ko asa US siya pero she's here pala now. great to see you, charm.

another future date i'll be having is with another friend, celia, na nag-base sa KL last year. nakasalubong ko sa ym, at chika kami when she gets back here. dami daw kwento ng lola. update update ng life ulit. kia i also bumped into online, although short lang kasi patulog na ko nun.

*

may isa pa dapat akong update-an session tonight but my ka-date flaked out on me hehehe. parinig! charot. wala, chichika ko sana ang isang dear friend about some friends na nag-traydor sa amin at one point in our lives or so. kumbaga, reap the la vendetta mode ko na ito, ikukuwento ko lang sa kanya hehehe. la lang...

*

for those who think na nag-generalize ako sa inyo when i left the show, it wasn't really so. alam niyo ang common denominator nating lahat, and i'm not mad at you guys. not even remotely. so peace peace tayo, lalo na ngayon na wala na ang source of all evil sa lugar na iyan. dibala?

amen to that.

*

dami ba cryptic? ganyan talaga ang life, lalo na pag gusto mong gawing libel-free ang publication. hey, i know my ethics man, unlike some people we know out there...na kelangan pang i-validate ang existence nila by glorifying themselves in minute ways. kawawang mga nilalang...sana makapiling niyo na si lord, soon.


*

ayan na, sanga-sanga na rin ang tingin ko. sign off na.

later.

see you Oct20sat at the Dyke Dialogues...

yeah yeah i know, i know, it's not the best of titles but hey, mga lawyers nag-isip nyan e so heheheeheh. peace mga ati! hihi. don't sue me!

sabi nga ni fire kagabi, "e i'm not a dyke e!" okay lang yun. sometimes labels are meant for other people, not for us, to identify us. ganun lang yun. hindi naman derogatory e...

ang point lang naman niyan e, punta kayo kung kayo ay babaeng nagmamahal ng babae at kung nais niyong makahuntahan ang mga kaedad niyo, mas bata sa inyo at mas matanda, join kayo dito. kahit wala kayong kakilala, okay lang. maybe this is the chance to meet new friends. kung shy kayo, puwede namang pumunta lang at mag-observe at makinig. walang prublema yun. iba naman tayo sa mga badingerz na pag may new fez e manghahaba ang leeg para ma-sight ang utaw at unahan na sa senyasan galore haaay. i've noticed that this doesn't happen as much in lesbian gatherings...unless you are just so uber-hot na prettybabe na you can't help it if you're gorgeous na talagang luluwa mata ng mga utaw sa yo...but that's another story. men really are from mars (they go to war to be near each other? hehe) and women are from venus (mahilig mag-observe ng beauty from afar, like gazing at the stars and planets chenes).

so again, hindi uso-uso ang "shy ako" mode, ha katê ! hehehe. (oo special mention ka talaga hahahaa. bitbitin mo yung mga pinakilala mo sa aking taga-babaylan.)

one of the organizers, The L Word Manila Meetup Group, is a young group i'm involved with na ang point every month ay magkita-kita kahit simpleng hangout lang somewhere in a cafe in cubao, morato or wherever, chikahan for hours, at kung anupaman. nagsimula ito as online community who like the show when it first came out some years back, then mga Lword-watching marathons sa bahay ng sinuman somewhere ensued. diverse ang mga tao dito. ang iba ay music lovers na nagha-hangout sa mga gigs ng ilang members na may banda, ang ilan naman ay sporty type na mga futbol/soccer gels, at ang iba ay mahilig manood ng sine o gumawa at mag-recite ng tula. at iba pa.

yung isang organizer, yung Rainbow Rights, ay isang LGBT rights org na puro lawyer ang member, mga matagal na rin sa LGBT advocacy movement, na naisipang mag-reconnect sa mga mas bata. masaya yang mga yan, mga miyembro rin ng iba pang lgbt orgs like LEAP (Lesbian Advocates of the Philippines) at involved rin sa Task Force Pride network like me. mga kick-ass lawyers sila. ang ilan sa kanila ang tuma-tumbling sa congress at senado para ipaglaban ang ating mga karapatan sa pagsulong ng Anti-Discrimination Bill (ADB) na itinataguyod ang paglaban sa diskriminasyon based sa sexual orientation/gender identity. kung may legal problem din kayo at lgbt kayo, puwede silang dumulog, para silang NGO.

yung host ng venue, Radar Pridewear, ay mga kaibigan ko na nag-iisip ng mga alternative things for lezzies na events, alternative to the usual disco disco exclusives na sampu sampera na rin diyan sa tabi-tabi. para ito sa mga hindi trip mag-usap sa maiingay na bar type. nasa venue rin ang store ng radar, at doon niyo makikita yung mga shirts na suot ko. bili rin kayo, sale sila ngayon.

sabi nga nila, this is a safe space for women. to tell you a bit of history sa building, dati ay may bar-resto diyan called gills and fins, na sa gabi ay nagiging exclusive lesbian disco dance place. bilang bata pa kami noong late 90s e hangout kami doon lagi, maraming EB ng chatters, special events connected to pride march activities, other lesbian or mixed LGBT activities chenes. doon nag-hold ng launch ang UP Sappho Society noong 1998. masaya sa katipunan noong mga panahong ito...we painted the town pink and purple.

kaya sinusubukan ulit naming buhayin ang lugar ng ganitong mga events. punta kayo mga gels. imbita rin kayo ng mga kaibigan niyo. para sa mga naghahanap ng mga matitinong diskusyon tungkol sa ating katauhan, baka ito na ang pagkakataong hinahanap niyo. at ang importante sa lugar na ito ay: walang husgahan.

okei?

o tara na punta tayo ha.


Rainbow Rights Project (R-Rights), Inc.,
in cooperation with Radar Pridewear and
The LWord Manila MeetupGroup, will be
holding its second informal chat/FGD
this month, entitled "Dyke Dialogues: A
Rainbow Exchange on Identities and
Partnerships" . It will be held on 20
October 2007, Saturday from 1:00-5:00
pm, at the the Roofdeck, FBR Arcade
(the building where Yellow Cab Pizza is),
317 Katipunan Avenue, Quezon City.

Aimed at reaching out to the young
members of the LGBT Community, R-
Rights members will be joined by veteran
Lezz activists who want to interact with
the new Lezz generation.

The activity will be a light discussion
on gender identification and
relationship dynamics and how these
issues determine the Philippine LGBT
advocacy landscape.

RSVP to (0917) 8870501

realignment with the lez perspective

punyeta talaga ang stars kung magsalita ano. swakers ever.

comme ca:

Taurus (Apr 20 - May 20)

You might be pulled in two directions as you struggle to find a comfortable middle path. On one hand, you have responsibilities that must be addressed, even if you don't want to work much. On the other hand, you may not be able to suppress your smile, for you know that your life is not quite as difficult these days as it has been in the past. Keep your focus on the brighter side, but don't go into denial about your current obligations.

wowee. galeng. swak siya ever. bow ako sa stars.

tama siya. focus on the brighter side. and yes, i am not in denial.

and for the first time in months, i can really say i am truly happy. as in genuinely happy.

i feel alive.

so don't dis me if i smile without reason these days. that just means it hits me that i am happy. because i truly am.

*

been enjoying the company of new friends and old ones lately, again. masarap talagang makipag-connect sa fellow lezzies talaga, i swear, especially the out ones. yung walang kiyeme ang barkadahan kapag nasa labas kayo, single or coupled, at obvious man o hindi na mga tungraiders kayo -- or kami. i really like that. and i so miss my old posse tuloy in that endeavor, kia, dre and the company of fellow sapphic sisters during our UP Sappho days. yung ha-hang out lang sa treehouse to eat dinner and drink and smoke after hanging out at the AS parking lot tambayan while chatting and smoking and all.

man, those were the days, no?

sumabit ang ilan sa amin last night sa hanging out mode ng aking friend si ging and her new jowa rose. it's their third monthsary pala. simple lang naman. just roamed around greenhills after hanging out in a morato meeting and dinner and that's it. well, it didn't help that ging got some kind of allergic reaction to some chinese food kaya the night ended early. e kasi naman ati, chinese e. ano pa ba expect natin lola? hehe. but seriously, i hope you're feeling okay na mare. si rose din.

hehe, i still can't get over couples celebrating monthsaries. i swear, super sickeningly sweet and pukingly romantic ito...or maybe it's just not for me. hahaha yeah i know, hindi talaga. hindi yan bitterness ha. ewan ko ba. minsan naaaliw lang ako sa mga gawaing pang-puso ng sangkatauhan e... heheh. but that's just me. weird ako that way, pramis. and i've become a hapless romantic hehehe. wotevah.

pero happy ako sa mga taong happy sa ganito. lalo na sa mga taong they really deserve to be happy after years or months of being miserable and all, or after having been through a messy separation (non)process with a selfish ex who personify the devil in various degrees and stuff. you get the picture. dami kasi ganyan sa lesbian world, tulad sa het world hehehe. hay sa dami ng naririnig kong kuwentong hiwalayan na ganito kasalimuot sa lezworld lately, puwede na ko magsulat ng nobela about it. hmm huway nat...

people deserve to be happy. yun lang naman ang bottomline ng lahat ng ito. and for some people, being coupled with someone who understands them is enough for them to be happy. siyempre kanya-kanya tayo ng definition ng happiness. yung iba, happy sa pagiging un-coupled. magtatayo na nga sina ani ng "tigang gang" sa penguin e hahahaha. ayuz yan mare! sali ko diyan! yung iba naman, happy sa pagkakaroon ng dalawang partners. siguro magaling sila sa time management, anesh? yung iba naman, happy sa pagkakaroon ng someone sa tabi nila kahit walang kategorya o definition ng kanilang samahan. yung iba naman, happy sa pagkakaroon ng virtual someone na kahit di pa nila nahahawakan e inlab na through online means. so kanya-kanyang chenelyn na lang yun, really.

so to you two lovebirds, cheers from the leaflens perspective. more monthsaries to come. next time, mag-cater na lang kasi kayo hehehe. sayang naman ang chef mode ni ate rose at sous-chef mode mo ging. wag na chinese food sa chinese resto. saka na chicken feet. oke? :P ate rose, wag lang may luya ha. ikamamatay ko naman yun hehe.