memoray

sometimes i remember memories of past things through the rays of the sun. the light falls differently on a cartain place at a certain time, and then you feel a dsitinct feeling that you bring with you wherever you go. that's how sunlight works for me: a reminder of memories.

the sunlight two hours ago reminded me of those days back when i was living in a house along naranghita street in project 2, back when i was cooped up in the smallest room of the 3-room house and my housemates were not in. i had the house all to myself but i was facing my old computer and the capiz-opened windows were letting the sun in, illuminating half the room, but my back was on that light and i was facing the dark side.

premonition?

emotional. i think that was the time i just learned my grandmother died. it was a sad light.

it kinda felt something like this:


i guess that's why i prefer the moon and the nighttime. the sun's light reminds me of so much sadness. i want to change that, though. but how?

channeling carrie

decided to surf the cable for the night for a nightcap earlier but failed in the csi double mission. replay ang csi vegas but saw something else: SEX AND THE CITY reruns preceded by a docu on it. the show ended sometime ago and i think they're rerunning the final season on hbo.

after about season 4, i think, i stopped watching this show because it stopped being witty and it just became...melodramatically fashionable. the wit took a vacation, the humor took a leave of absence and man, the shwe-shwes started claiming the show for the fashion element eklat. major turn off. for me, it has always been the story, witty dialogues and great characterization. c'est tout.

seeing the double-show tonight was great. it reminded me of the first seasons. i loved the book; kia lent it to me when she found it in their booksale warehouse "raid." season 1 and 2 reflected the book superbly but well, hollywood took over later on. and the fashion industry. dun na namatay ang interes ko. and besides, QUEER AS FOLK just came to my attention at that time so goodbye straight women, hello gay guys and token lesbian couple. then THE L WORD came and wow, wala na talaga ako sa het scene; traded manhattan maidens for los angeles lesbianics.

but the eps tonight were great. bumalik yung humor. and i didn't know na ang dami na palang nangyari sa girls. charlotte got married again to a sensitive bald guy, carrie's dating a russian artist but that fucker mister big's still leaving an imprint (i hate him to death and i hated her for hurting aidan the furniture maker -- the storyline was very close to home at the time of airing kasi nyeheheh), miranda got married to steve din pala after having his baby, and my idol samantha had stage one cancer removed. breast c siguro. she's in chemo now.

wow. talk about growing up. the show did just that. an ep just caught my attention one cable-surfing time years ago during the first season because that was the time i was being a siryus en dedikeyted writer and i was like making love to my computer na every night and writing the hell out of me. kaya relate ako dun kay carrie the writer in a sense. the grouping reminded me of my 2 high school friends na ka-chika ko during my het days when we used to meet like every tuesday night yata and talk about sexual encounters chuva. yea, just like what they were doing in the show. i was in my early twenties then and it was fun. the manhattan girls were in their thirties but the talk sounded the same. it was a blast.

so now i'm channeling carrie bradshaw and just typing away. and like a typical (filipino?) writer, there's a computer in front of me and an alcoholic drink by my side hehe. ching.

but i'm amazed. the good writing is back. i guess they really went overtime in brainstorming and tried to produce a memorable last season. pero ganun pa rin; the reasons why i fell in love with this show before were back, and more -- and updated. i mean, hey, samantha had cancer. shit, i can relate to that scare. it was just early this year when i went voluntarily for an ultrasound because i thought i felt something in my breasts. false alarm, thank goddesses (ang official finding: malaki lang ang suso mo hija, normal nodules lang yan. nyeta). but having women near my age getting breast cancer was just freaky. truly freaky. it reminds us that we're all creatures with indefinite but upcoming deadlines. that was a scary time, man. well, buti na lang nireimburse ng isis yung part ng medical expense.

and then there's charlotte and marriage, again, and having a baby. well, i gave up on having a baby a long time ago. college pa lang kami, tambay sa lobby ng masscomm e nadesisyunan ko na ito, na ayaw kong magbuntis. pero natatapat naman ako sa mga babaeng nais magbuntis... life is funny in a non-haha type of way sometimes, y'know.

tapos miranda and steve got married and looking for a house in brooklyn. i can just imagine my good friend in new york who underwent the same househunting scheme years ago with her partner. siguro she had the same picture there. i can imagine them like that, complete with the ket and the doggiedog. it made me nostalgic for her and i missed her company upon seeing that scene. i miss having conversations with good, decent, smart and funny people lately, and she's one of a kind in this sense.

interesting turn of events. now i'm curious how it ended. yea, i avoided the hullaballo when it ended kasi nga because of the shwe shwe rockwell fashionista crowd claiming. i just received constant updates from my sister in california who was texting me about the details. well, now i'm watching again. in the end, it's still the writing that matters. i already know these women. i want to know how it ends, and how they leave us. they left an imprint in me, at a time when i was looking for originality that spoke to me -- and it did. wow. i'm looking for the same thing now, but with the exlusive women flavor na. sadly, even TLW can't live up to that.

i need to write that show myself, i guess. wish me luck.

*

well, i had a nice day overall gastronomically speaking. had a meeting with a warner music exec while having prime rib steak and a nice lady client while having eggplant parmigiana. yum. it was a nice day. sayang hindi pa ready ang 16mm works ng students ko so we're seeing that next week. on friday, i deal with screenplays. argh. wish me luck. need betacarotene loading.

*

hey, a kyoto-based australian acquaintance of mine (the one who looks a lot like nicole kidman, no kidding) just emailed saying they'll be here in november. kewl! sayang hindi october, abutan sana nila yung feminista series sa bistro. yea darating din yung jap friend niyang kasama, the one who showed me her cellphone with a tv! as in tv! well, it would be nice to hang out with them again! looking forward to that.

and as we say goodnight...

Steven Soderbergh Your film will be 56% romantic, 27% comedy, 40% complex plot, and a $ 30 million budget.

Filmography: Sex Lies and Videotape, Traffic, Ocean's Eleven, Ocean's Twelve, Erin Brockovich, and various other homemade independent films. He may just want to follow you around for a few months and construct a film out of that. Your humor is either dry or non-existant, but your life is somewhat exciting romantically because you're "bad." At least you'll be surrounded by the best-looking people who will be cast as your friends, who in real life are probably just as good-looking. Then when he wins the Academy Award for your film, he won't have to make anymore "Ocean's" films.

My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 66% on action-romance You scored higher than 22% on humor You scored higher than 54% on complexity You scored higher than 29% on budget

Link: The Director Who Films Your Life Test written by bingomosquito on Ok Cupid

ganoooooon? i hated FULL FRONTAL ha utang na loob! i demand a recount! hello garci...

islipi

when was the last time you had sex?

...

wala lang. wala akong masulat. thought of something shocking. was thinking of a million thoughts earlier but when i opened this, hala ala na... na-drain bigla sa online student consultation... sobrang haytek kasi si mam hehehe.

i'm hating the word "attachment" lately. i wonder why. somehow it's connected to the word "virus" which somehow leads me to ask, nagkokondom kaya siya? hahaha. naloloka na ko. wala, i'm just playing with words. 'wag nyo ko seryosohin. :P my friends are so caring ha. ching!

sino'ng may keyboard na may pedal dyan? pahiram naman o, for one night only. i'm serious now. e me.

i finally caught a glimpse of VIETNAM ROSE the other night. my friend's the head writer. she texted us to watch the premiere pero kasabay siya ng ILUSYON gala sa peyups. hay pagsisisi... nasa huli... :P to quote christian slater quoting charlie sheen and emilio esteves in a quoted magazine interview eons ago when they were dissing keanu reeves who just appeared in the bertolucci LITTLE BUDDHA epic: how did this guy get in?

mismo.

maybe sleeping with david geffen didn't hurt. cha-riiiiing!

i'm drunk on puyat. nyeta.

bloghopping led me to winterdoll's statement and i try to apply it to myself. do i live for the moment or do i live for the future? right now, je ne sais pas talaga. ikaw?

hmmm looking forward to a ribeye steak lunch tomorrow yum :P :P :P avowed carnivore here peeps.

and i'm thinking of an orange martial artist tarsier right now thanks to kris lacaba. haha. long story hard to tell. basta orange siya. at tarsier.

sana may faculty promotion points ang blogging ano. tumataginting na mega-points ako dun if ever. since 2002! or 2000? kakatawa, akala ng estudyante ko generation lang nila ang nagba-blog. di nya alam na nauna kami dito at may mga nauna sa amin ng konti ang agwat ng edad pataas. haha. try asking them if they associate blogger with the word pyro.

ageist.

me want isaw now.

nourishment. yea i got plenty last night shlurp. yummy. 'ika nga ni oliver sa OLIVER! "i want some...more..."

shlurp.

martial law baby

decades ago today, the philippines was placed under martial law by a now-dead president. tyrant is more like it.

i've always been labeled as a martial law baby because i was born in april 1973. i was already in my mum's womb when it was declared. pero nang nagkamulat ako, puro dilaw na ang nasa kalye. i was 13 when cory aquino became president. so saan talaga ako belong? i don't know. actually, i don't care anymore.

thirtyplus years later, the country is still fucked up. i remember there was a time when i can convert one whole US dollar into pesos (twenty pesos) and i can even convert its smaller equivalents (dime, nickel, quarter). this was how i used to budget buying chocolate bars in vending machines inside clark air base in pampanga where my pop was stationed for a while as the manager of pldt. that was also how i budgeted how much was the cup of baskin robbins ice cream i was ordering (para hindi mapagalitan ni mommy na sobrang mahal). that was also how i computed how much i lost na in those huge pinball machines na pacman game sa bowling alley doon. i spent part of my childhood that way. now, i can't even keep up if the dollar is already 50 pesos or more, or if it already hit 60. hay naku. matutulad kaya tayo sa mga bansa tulad ng laos na ang denomination ng pera nila ay mas marami pa sa apat na zero dahil ganun kababa ang value ng pera nila? (yea, akala ko ang rich ng friend kong laotian when she showed me she had a 10,000 bill in her wallet. hindi pala).

anyway, why am i blogging this? i read a leaflet earlier kasi from...anak... one of those groups. anakbayan? something. inside UP, na martial law ek nga pala today, and they were encouraging people to march to oust gloria and wear red. so i wore my yellow-starred red shirt from hanoi that my friend dré gave me when she came home from vietnam dati. puwede na?

to answer your Q bjelland, anybody can write a lesbian story as long as the sensibilities of the story properly depict/reflect/uplift the lesbian experience. but that's just my opinion. crucial diyan yung uplift. dapat positivity naman ang maidulot ng new body of work sa lesbian literature ng non-lesbian writer. that goes for films, too. i'm just reacting on those macho men who try to interpret lesbian writings and infuse their own interpretations... kung interpretation nga bang matatawag iyon. what i mean is, adaptation na nga ini, di pa pinaghusayan. kung sinulat nila yun, ayos lang. look at kevin clark's... what's that film na may lesbian character? ewan ko. feeling ko forgivable yun pero he didn't try to reprsent naman the lesbian experience there e, parang a lesbian thru his eyes lang ang characterization so that's okay.

did i make sense?

parang yung sa pilot episode ng THE L WORD when one half of the lesbian couple was reacting to having a het male psychiatrist for their counseling session. e gets na gets naman ng doc yung lez experience so keri siyang pakinggan.

ay ewan basta yun na yun. hehe.

marami na namang nagsulat ng materyal na lesbian na di lesbian. si caroline hau yata may short story noon na ganito. parang ako, i have several published short stories with gay male leads. e hindi naman ako bakla in body (in spirit lang hehe). deva lola? so go write!

eh?

i just got an email from cinemabuhay. cinemabuhay? ang weird! i didn't get shortlisted but cenon did. i hope this is really legit, for his sake. man. kakaiba. ang weird! pero anyway, we'll see. cinemabuhay? wala na bang mas...imaginative term????? sabi nga ni dong abay, natatawa ako hihihihiiiii... parang ang layo no. sobrang layo. layo layo layo. hahaha. susunod na susulpot niyan, cinemakibaka. cinemalungkot. cinemasaya. hahaha kainis.

bakit ba ang daming emails about jesus lord eklat forward to others for blessings chuva. since when did god go digital? o malapit na ba ang apocalypse at di ko lang alam? tell me.

sorry biatch mode, the monthly curse is here e. which means di ako ulit papasok sa iskul today. just like yesterday. anyway, online/email consultation naman kami ng students ko so that's cool.

i want more choco mousse.

in ____ we trust (fill in da blanks ka na lang)

will you trust your material to another person to develop it?

trap question iyan for writers who give out their material for others to work on as another form: film, video, music, comics, etc. tricky tricky.

if you're a lesbian writer, would you give your material to (99% probable) heterosexist men to turn into an audiovisual material? i don't think so. i mean come on, no matter how politically correct we presume ourselves to be, the bottomline is, men are still from mars and women are from venus, even if in some parts of venus, sila-sila ang nagkakatuluyan heheheh. you get my point?

basta. iba. at hindi reverse-sexism yan ha. i'm just stating a fact.

ang pangit.

saka 'pag "nakakalalaki" ang isang babae, tumbuy man o supergelay, the castration anxiety is still the same for these freaking men.

men, e.

man-hater ba ang dating ko? hindi naman. ang sa akinlang naman ay...

pangit kasi e. sayang.

btw, what's nakaka-lalaki in english?

*

i just realized that what direk erik matti was saying as "bottle neck" ay BOTTOMLINE! hahahaha. oh sorry i just came out of some grueling weeks (as in mugtu pa eyes ever at puyat) of editing a 200 page transcription of the cinemalaya film congress at the ccp months ago that the ncca yata will turn into a book or something. kaya i'm still reeling from the...haahaha "oral typos." punyetah ang bad ko.

bottleneck. bottleneck! this, from a man who once said sa premiere ng film niya na ang documentary ay shooting a scene with the camera attached to a tripod. ngak! naloka si noel vera dun hane! i guess he never heard of cinema verité pare. ano pare? tama ba pare? hahahah tangna ang bad ko.

les gens sont étranges, 'ika nga ng the doors...

meet rama

wala lang...

down film memory lane

shet shet shet. i'm praying for something to materialize... hope it does. cross your fingers. and legs, too. :) kidding.

the epix contest has concluded. i wonder who got included in the coffeetable book. wow, how i wish... bigatin judges. neal oshima, bencab, and some other foto fogeys. forgot the names. dapat yata sa pro division ako sumali. hm. pero hindi rin.

just a little before i turn in. my eyes have been spinning na from editing the whooooooole freaking day, save for the time i went out and visited my students' location shooting for their 16mm film project. this group has good chemistry. i hope everything turned out well. next week, i visit the others. i'm worried about the third group, though. most of the slackers seem to be there. i hope they will be able to pull through. hay anu ba to feeling nanay sa istyudeynts! hehe.

i don't get the deal with the department about film. there's no more subsidy of raw stock unlike in our time when we were alloted a 100ft roll of tungsten film each group of three. we had spring-wound bolexes to play with. now, they have to rent cams from kodak and buy a minimum number of raw stock cans... what gives????? instead of making student film life a bliss, kodak's become a burden of sorts. i don't know what transpired from 1995 to 2005. man, times they are a-changin' indeed. and then there's the PIA filmlab closing down. where are they gonna edit their films??? all the darn MOA linkages have been broken... kawawa mga students. they have to spend at least 10k per group per film. good thing i divided them into 5 to lessen the burden. shucks, if this happened to our generation, hindi na siguro nag-film thesis yung mga nag-16mm a decade ago like me, sari dalena, corina millado, don michael perez and fellow conconistas rose barcarlos and aimee compuesto. sino pa ba? teka bat ko ba nilalagay complete names nila? ah, wala lang, trip ko lang. i wonder how they are doing. can't anybody out there repair those darn bolex cams? sayang naman.

sayang. i remember when we first handled film in cinematography class (and they don't even call it cinematography anymore! but that's another issue) way back. excited kami syempre. the sound of the film cam purr, the loading in semi-darkness using loading bags, even the moment i fixed the film gate when a film chip got stuck there (and hech exclaimed: "wow galeng para kang si mang cv!" haha), and how i was amazed at watching my groupmate transform herself into an old woman with the help of eggyolk DIY prosthetics. nakakatuwa. i wanted to contribute my expertise back then (making fake edible blood) but there was no use for blood in our film short so i used that on our directing class video instead. it was actually fun screening our film to my class. how things looked differently back then. philcoa was definitely different; we were able to film the creek there that they covered up now,before citimall was there. and quezon circle was still two-way, with the proper intersection lights being followed,and there were shanties along katipunan balara. basta, kakatuwang visual history ang film.

still, i admire those who pursue their theses in film, like mayo's bro raya. 35mm pa 'ata siya. gutsy. i just hope that kid's early success doesn't go to his head. delikado that way, like some people we know...

blast from the past. i passed by hi-top qave to pick up a few things and i fell in line at the cash register there that used this cash register machine that looks like it's from the 1950s! i swear! alam mo yun, yung parang gamit ni pop tate sa archie comics of my youth, maumbok na ewan... even the typeset of the receipt, parang gutenberg version of the cash register -- ancient! grabe nakakatuwa. it's like when i spotted an ancient turn of the century-ish typewriter sa isang novelty store sa galleria years ago na ka-brand at kamukha ng ginagamit ni virgina woolf. man, i wanted to buy that. bat di ko nga ba binili noon yun? gems like that are rare, like when my film batchmate saw a canon scoopic 16mm cam displayed in a pawnshop for 5k!!! syempre binili nya at ang catch, walang intermittent movement kundi single frame operation lang. good for animation, his hilig, kaya yun ang thesis nya. swerte no. sa vintage pop store sa cubao x, may mga bolex din e at ancient still slrs. kaya lang hindi for sale. kakainis. pangtakam lang pala. kill! kill! >:|

hay, those were the days... now, everything's run according to the digital god. good and bad. the debate continues. sige na nga, good kasi affordable. so kodak should keep up and start slashing prices. sa totoo lang, they'll make a killing pa. i don't know why they can't see that. they always cite the tony gloria example. nubah. oh well, c'est la vie.

*

just saw barbie almalbis' new video... na chinachaka ng mga kiddies nung isang linggo dito sa bahay haha. ano nga yun? mas macho pa si barbie sa guy? sino nga ba nagsabi nun? hahaha ang kabataan talaga hane. pero ha, kapal ng lipstick nung boylet! hehe. didn't know she went solo na. well, about time, i think. pero ibang-iba na siya when i used to see her around qc gig places years ago. time flies. well, good luck sa kanya. i hope she finds na what she's looking for.

ay, kyla video naman. is this the one kaya that sig directed, na 20k budget at ang 15k ay binayad sa hairdresser/make-up artist na bitbit ni kyla? haha. abonado pa. hay, such is the life. i wonder if things will change. ever. the rules are still the same, methinks. hay.

tulog na nga. bonne nuit. umaga na pala. bonjour?

how do you document real life when real life's getting more like fiction these days?

and so it shall be... a movie!!!!!!!!!

*gasp*

it's done! chris columbus actually finished it. the movie version of RENT, this musical that i really really really love. for some strange reason, i am attracted to this musical since the late '90s, since a friend of mine introduced the musical to me, even though i have quite a few things to say about jonathan larson's lesbian portrayals... but the music's so damn good so i forgive him. goddess rest his soul.

nah actually, it's not strange. the trailer said this musical defined a generation. they were referring to mine. promise. it began with REALITY BITES the film and escalated with this musical.

watch the "seasons of love" excerpt. punyeta naiyak din ako. gaya-gaya ko sa yo salamangkiero! hehe. i love this song talaga.

five hundred twenty-five thousand six hundred minutes
five hundred twenty-five thousand journeys to plan
five hundred twenty-five thousand six hundred minutes
how do you measure the life of a woman or a man?

yeah, how do you?

but the movie still below reminds me of a... concon picture eons ago. when we were still intact. soulfully.

di ba? and somebody's wearing a catsuit, too! si cenon nga lang yun hehe. i was dressed as jodie foster in THE ACCUSED. imagine that.

darn. how outdated can this get. mark's using a bolex camera. haha. a bolex! spring-wound pa! MOS. tangina flashback to my 16mm film thesis shoot days of the mid-'90s... dapat they updated this to a mini-dv instead. but hey, he is a filmmaker so bow. kaya lang poor nga sila di ba so how can he score the money to buy film? unless he sleeps with someone from kodak para makakuha ng negatibo hehe...

ang galeng. nasa kalye sila. totoong kalye! neo-realism, i love you. streets of new york talaga. wow. thank goodness for location shooting! mas nabuhay ang kwento nito. iba kasi pag stage, e. i watched the original staging of monique wilson's new voice company in music museum where she mooned the audience hehe. also caught the re-run at the gsis theater with conconistas. the first one was better. i wasn't happy with the very butch portrayal of the lesbian lawyer there. lynn sherman did the role justice in the original run. and she looked cuter in a suit hehe. saka parang calvin millado lost the 'roger angst' in the second run. i dunno why.

watch the trailers here.

wow may actual dialogue!!! hehe. not just music like madonna's EVITA years back. i like!

shucks excited na ko to see how they executed "la vie boheme" hehe. who can ever forget these lines:

to sodomy
it's between god and me
to S & M
la vie boheme!

to anyone out of the mainstream
is anyone in the mainstream
to anyone alive with a sex drive

ayuz.

*

nate-tense na ko ever sa ROCKSTAR INXS. ang hindi alam kasi ng ibang contestants ay sandamakmak ang pinoy sa mundo kaya maraming bumoboto kay fil-aussie MiG ayesa heheh. it's the jasmine trias hawaii phenomenon, dude. i actually know one person who texts her votes. devah. pinoy rocks! pero punyeta kelan ba machuchugi si jd yabang!

hey did you know that mig used to play ANGEL in a Rent production in, um, sa London 'ata. trivia. nabasa ko sa inquirer. hmmmmmmm lumalakas ang radar koh sa kanya maderrrr...

well, no day but today, folks...

dalaga na si maximo!

congratulations to my friend raymond lee, producer of the cinemalaya grantee ANG PAGDADALAGA NI MAXIMO OLIVEROS. the film won at the montreal filmfest! mabuhei ang mga vaklers! yipee! :) mabuhay ka ati!!! congrats din kay writer mich at direk aureus.

from pdi:
A FILIPINO DIGITAL FILM WON THE GOLDEN Zenith award in the First Films category of the 29th Montreal World Film Festival.
“Ang Pagdadalaga ni Maximo Oliveros (The Blossoming of Maximo Oliveros),” directed by Aureaus Solito, written by Michiko Yamamoto and produced by ufo Pictures, was a product of the Cinemalaya Independent Film Festival, where it received the Special Jury Prize last July.
The Montreal film fest, held from Aug. 26 to Sept. 5, screened over 340 movies from 70 countries.

if you missed it and they screen it again either at ccp or UP, try to catch it. it's really great. promise.

great! who's next?

*

went to the fdcp office last monday to submit my entry. happy naman. nakakatuwa at nakakatawa lang minsan kapag submission time na sa mga kontes, nagkikita-kita kaming magkakakilala haha. syempre sinu-sino rin ba naman sasali sa ma kontes na yan kundi kami-kami rin at saka syempre yung iba rin. although at ncca, i don't see anybody there. lagi. i wonder why. sa palanca lang. especially pag near midnight deadline na. ayan, kilala ko kung sino ang mga midnight submitters hehehe.

yes i did it. submitted skip and kemikal. was unfortunate at the boracay co-prod grant but it's okay. gives me more time to tweak the material, esp this coming sembreak. i also revisited an old script, the one that won at the fdfpi contest years ago. hm. i never thought na napaka-komersyal ko magsulat ng pelikula!!! and dearly departed mentor hammy sotto thought otherwise... how people change, sir. truly.

poetry reading at conspiracy this tuesday, punta kayo

hi guys! hope you can come. this is for free. free entrance! Writers' Night Tuesdays at Conspiracy.

the place is along Visayas Avenue just right off the elliptical road/qc circle. from circle, turn right sa visayas. just go straight until you see the shell gas station. conspiracy is right across shell. for those with cars and are coming via cab, you can make a u-turn at the intersection a few seconds past shell (7-11 corner).

for those who dont know, the place is a bar-resto owned by lots of alternative musicians, artists and press people (eg joey ayala, cynthia alexander, conrado dequiros, bayang barrios, gary granada, cookie chua, etc basta limampu sila at kadalasan they perform there). may no smoking section inside and it's an open-air garden type. parking sa tabi ng bar is the equitable bank parking lot.

the event will start at 7pm sharp and will end by 9pm. after that, you can stay on and enjoy the music of jun lopito who will play that night 'til closing time.

salamat. see ya.

 

--------------

HALU-HALO sa Conspiracy Bar
sept 6, 7pm-9pm

poetry reading and poets/writers sing din

tinatampok sina lyrah salanga, john torralba, vlad gonzales, aries atienza, joey baquiran, libay linsangan cantor, roselle pineda, bobet mendoza, christine bellen, jasmine icasiano, abet umil, alex remonillo at carol bello (ng pinikpikan band). tutugtog ang winono band nina rommel rodriguez at ang demonic band.

in between waking and sleeping...

...sucks. big time. especially if your "higher powers" are somewhat going on and off the radar for some time now. paranormal is an understatement. hay. good thing i have cats here. sa totoo lang. wanted to get one more pa nga sana, earlier, when we saw kitties at malingap. i want a black kitty because it has blue eyes. hey, my eyes were blue when i was a baby. most people thought i was american when i was small. okay where did that come from?

waking or sleeping? tangna i need to acquire crystals. bigger ones. they helped before. wah. running out of incense, too. anybody out there going to thailand soon? magpapabili ako incense cones sandamakmak. email me. i'm serious. and colgate herbal na rin. :)

i am somewhat addicted to two reality shows lately, pero okay lang din na ma-miss. yeah you guessed it, Rock STAR INXS, before, i thought bakit kelangan nilang palitan si michael hutchence? walang makakapalit sa kanya! can those guys sing "need you tonight" and make you water-water down there? noooooo. syempre, as a default pinoy, i root for MiG ayesa, the pinoy-aussie dude who looks like a very lanky hobbit. i hope they kick that jd out na please lang. nuknukan ng yabang ang puta. saka si marty, parang botox ang mukha, hindi gumagalaw ang lines. walang lines! nalaglag kanina yung black dude. yeah i agree with his comment, mukhang may tinge of racial profiling don in a way. australia pa.

the other show? THE APPRENTICE. sinong nanalo last season??? i missed the ending pala. yung season with people like ivana, maria and company names apex and... i forgot the other one. anyone know? leave a message. oks yung laban this season, mga nag-college at hindi. lampaso mga nag-college hahaha.

hey, i did it. submitted a 50-page headstart for a novel. yeheyyy! shucks sana mapili. goddesses bless me please. and a bright idea by a bright person: gawin ko na lang itong novel as my MA thesis! yes! oo nga! para kasing ayoko nang balikan yung early shorts ko e. baka akalain nila wala na ko ibang nasulat sa life ko kundi yung nasulat ko nung first 3 years ko of being a literary writer, parang isang ikatlong titser dyan na nakapasa ng MA nya with a very very sucky collection that contained the same characters. same characters pare. hello imagination, nahan ka???? absent. reminds me of sarah shuster ni jenny sa THE L WORD. ngak.

i just realized it's a "-ber" month na pala. they've started counting the days til xmas on the radio. fuck. how i hated the yuletide ever. but i think that will change soon. somebody important to me right now was born around that time (as in pasko talaga) so i'm beginning to think that that holiday better focus on the thought that good people were born that day aside from jesus. so i'm gonna do just that. the script, the novel, the photos and the poems won't come out and fly (soar!) if it weren't for her. so thanks.