11 August 2007

sons of bitches, daughters of bastards, and the parents of the proud

sometimes i pity people who are the offspring of people who have made a name in their respective fields or who have etched some kind of niche using their genuine nature-blessed and hardwork-earned talent and skill, especially those who had to face real hardships and had to face real adversaries and obstacles in order to achieve their ambitions, goals and dreams in their own lives.

the children of these people sometimes have it easy or have it harder. not hard, harder, because their parents serve as more than mere yardsticks to measure themselves up to baga. like i have this poet friend who is the child of famous writers. my poet friend told me that he finds it weird that some people gush to him when they realize who his parents are. and he will retort "sila sambahin niyo, hindi ako" or something to that effect. i know it also gives him undue pressure to be as excellent in the same field as his parents, as is what's expected of offspring in general in this country. hence, we see the family of doctors, architects, lawyers etc. that's why firms have the "lastname and sons" type of title in their family businesses. it's expected.

i remember seeing a docu about bruce lee's son brandon lee. one time when he was auditioning for a role, someone scribbled at the back of his headshot photo "bruce lee's son" and when he saw that the audition officer saw that, his world kinda crumbled. that's because he would have preferred getting the role using his own merit, without the blessing-cum-burden of being named as the offspring of the bruce lee. imagine the pressure on him! poor guy. may he rest in peace. his dad, too.

most times i just loathe those who freely ride the coattails of their parents to get to places and heights they could never even imagine, let alone reach with their own two feet. there's a lot of that going on especially in the arts scene, any arts, name it, it's there. they're there. like who gives a flying fuck if their father is the famous painter or their mother is the famous singer or whatever. if they use their parents to get from point a to b, fine. maybe sometimes they have to do that. maybe it's a survival instinct of sorts. if they use their parents' name to jump the line from point a to point z, that's another thing altogether. it's worse a million times more than the first one. but what's even worse is if they use their parents' name to bully, elbow and threaten their way in jumping from point a to point z. now that sucks to high heaven. as in.

there are even subcategories within this certain category of coattail riders. but the subcategory i kinda pity are those who were just incidentally caught on the coattails and didn't have the choice, guts, brains or natural ability/agility to unhook themselves for most part of their lives. thus, they live within the shadows of their parents, being dragged and all as they are involuntarily hooked and dragged along unknowingly. thus, they end up with their heads being bounced along, experiencing every pothole or hump and all textures along the way. they get internal hemorrhage without them
even knowing, nor their parents. thus, they end up damaged and derailed, most times a menace to their own self and to the society at large. in short, they need therapy. big time. like forever. at now na.

now i think the topper of this is the combination of the hemorrhaged coattail rider and the bullying to point a to z coattail rider. that is just the pits, and they have their own reservations in a private level within one of the circles of hell. reservation just for them, yes, parang sinehan sa mall, reserved seating for one screening only. sila reserved seating for one eternity.

masaya sana if the offspring and their parents share their lives and end up being talent tandems. like i met this comics artist who shares the same interest with his kid, his less than ten year old kid, and they both draw and make comics. now that is just the sweetest. i also have friends who are this kind of offspring but on a different level. like they choose to co-exist within the artistic frame but not necessarily doing the same thing. they use another medium or experiment on their own, and their parents encourage them, not force them, or just keep silent but are silently cheering them on in the background. everybody happy. no one's breathing down each other's neck baga. happy yon.

on the other hand, i also pity the parents who are proud of what they have done and achieved but sadly, no one from their brood wanted to take the same path, not even take a peek man lang. they run towards the opposite direction. the offspring have their own reasons for running anyway, and we know and believe reasons are aplenty. and we also respect those reasons. i also have friends like this.

but focusing on the parents who are nice enough naman as parents, sad lang ako that they cannot share their passion and knowledge with their own. like my former movie boss who's such a young person at heart when it comes to the love of cinema and filmmaking that we secretly call him "daddy groovy." because of his good looks and swagger (men, he is da original mister suabe ha, complete with hair pomada and stylish shades at the age of 50), he sired lotsa children within and outside showbiz. well, his clan is known to do that naman. human version ng cloud seeding yata ang pastime nila. however, none of his children even took to the camera and started loving what's in front of it. no one was awed by this mechanical wonder as anne rice described it. so when i met him, we clicked, and young as i was, i became his somewhat adopted cinematic daughter and he was my adopted cinematic daddy groovy. i can see the spark in his eyes whenever we would talk about filmmaking in the office or in the sets of our films, and i noted the sadness in his voice when he mentioned one day during those talks that none of his kids (legit or otherwise) had the same family interest. after all, he was also the proud kid of parents who established a niche in philippine cinema history. "walang hilig" sabi pa niya, sabay iling. i felt genuinely sad for the man...

well, these are the thoughts that went through my head this friday midnight or early saturday morning, depending on your state of mind (and to paraphrase alanis). kasi i saw some of these kids and parents tonight in our friday film bar event, and that's also why i'm steering clear of the current cinemanila. don't want to see more of these kinds of offspring, especially the ones with reservations in hell. sad sila.

what's also sad is the fact that another former movie boss and mentor, miss boots, is sad. tito pete died yesterday. i saw it on the news. i don't think i could muster the strength to go to arlington and visit her now in this state. but knowing her strong and diplomatic demeanor, she would still be shining bright there even if her most precious person is now gone. man, i don't think i can handle that... i have this thing with deaths and funerals. i try to avoid attending wakes. it's just sheer sadness. and i pity the ones who have been left... hay naku. doon sana ko pupunta tonight after the film bar launch but... not enough courage talaga. hirap... hay. sad. :(

hodgepodge ang araw na ito. not to mention i am quite loveless this weekend due to busy duties tying up the other party. hay... that's why sometimes i hate missing someone... oh well. there's always the movies...

wotevah. pengeng ice cream at isaw.

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