haggard na me, tanga na u?

...also known as the globelines epic saga repair...

hay at last, my continuing saga with globelines' idiocy ended this week. it's supposedly my first week of classes but i decided to push it back to next week, also to give time to the kiddies to polish their projects, as i know, from experience, that the first week back after the yuletide holidays are the slooooowest sa kanilang katawan at lalo na sa utak (iyon ay kung hindi pa given na slowness talaga ang utak-utakan nila, but that's another angst post).


right before ondoy hit, mga 2-3 days before, i reported that wala kaming makuhang internet connection kaya supposedly, that saturday when ondoy hit, a repair crew were on their way here from mandaluyong. they called once to say they are on their way, and then after 3 hours, they called again to say they cannot make it due to the rising flood waters in mandaluyong. and of course, after that call, the rest is philippine natural calamity disaster history.

come october, i received my latest billing for the september cycle (my cutoff date is every 12th of the month) and i checked if i am being billed for the time i had no service (our condo buildings were all victimized without phone lines the rest of 2009 since september ondoy). we were all ready to take the consequences because we understood the enormous amount of time, effort and of course money the repairs would take. nag-swimming kaya lahat dito sa ground floor, na umabot hanggang kisame ng lobby ang tubig-baha, leaving the gym, day care room, the admin office, all elevators, function rooms, mailboxes, electricity and phonelines thingamajigs under the sea. ayuz. so kaya october and november passed and we still didn't have any phone lines, although the electricity and water supply came back and normalized mga within two weeks after ondoy so bet lang. the phone lines are a different story.

my dad has been a longtime manager of pldt all his working life before he retired and he knew about repairs and stuff like that, and he found a lot of anomalies both the building admins and globelines were doing which made subscribers like me suffer unnecessarily. in the end, globe had more problems than the admin side, as i found out the masaklap way.

two months and a day after ondoy, globe gave us all love letters and said that repairs are still ongoing and part of it is that we all need to have our phone number changed, a move which my father says is unnecessary because those are merely numbers assignment. during that time, we monitored the phone and found out that there was a dialtone already by november 26 but we cannot make outgoing calls or receive incoming ones; you just hear a recording from globe saying calls still cannot be made chenelyn. we also had to sign a form that we are okay-ing the new number reassignment and so i went to globelines in sm marikina to submit that form. that was december 4. they said in 2-3 days' time, my new phone number will be operational and thus my old package of phone line+broadband will resume automatically. in addition, a repair crew will visit my place and check my internet connection which i originally asked them to do before ondoy.

of course, hindi naganap iyon. nasa pilipinas tayo, remember? inept customer service land.

december 7, i discovered that i already have a working dialtone and i can call outside na. but the incoming, wala. so i called globe to ask about it, plus the internet thingie. may darating daw na crew in 2-3 days' time to see the problem. lumipas iyon at walang naganap. so tinesting namin. i asked my mother, who lives in a faraway and higher place village here in marikina, too, where i grew up, to call the new number and old number i had, just to see what's working. the old one isn't working, pero sa new one, may sumagot. aha, at ang sumagot... kapitbahay ko. sa higher floor than me. aba teka, malabo. so i reported this to globelines at least twice, and they have a term for it: interchange of numbers. so now, i don't know what number is working sa akin sa outgoing calls. i told them that i don't care if they give me my old number or another number, as long as i have a number and an internet connection!

again, hindi naganap ito... kaagad.

eto na. nakaka-apat na yata akong tawag sa globe at nakaka-tatlong bigay na sila ng customer reference number, dahil ilang ulit palang kinansela ang repair crew visit dito sa unit ko dahil may "ongoing system maintenance" sa buong building daw. ang bilin ko lang lagi, sana sa cellphone nila ako tawagan dahil di ko alam ano'ng phone number ang gumagana nga sa telepono ko. oo daw.

mapagpasensiya naman akong tao kaya dinedma ko na ulit ito, until i found out na may repair crew palang pupunta sana dito, at ang tinawagan nila ay ang phone number kong bago na sa kapitbahay ko bumabagsak. and what's worse is that nung hanapin daw nila ako doon para sabihing may system maintenance pa rin kaya di pa rin sila makakapunta, ang sagot ng isang taong nakausap nila na itago natin sa pangalang nicole eugenio ay "wala po siya rito" (meaning me, dahil they asked for me) at nang tinanong kung sino si nicole, sabi niya ay "pamangkin po niya ako." TUMBLING!!!!! dahil ang nakatira lang sa unit ko ay ako siyempre at ang girlfriend ko, at hindi nicole eugenio ang pangalan niya. HAGGARD!!!! at wala kaming paranormal resident by the name of nicole eugenio na kayang itaas ang telepono at sumagot. nubah!

so finally, nakarinig sa akin ang globe, thrice yata, reiterating na please, ano ba ang mahirap intindihin sa "tawagan niyo ako sa cellphone kapag pupunta kayo dito" dahil nga sa hindi sa akin bumabagsak ang landline calls kundi sa kapitbahay!!!! by that time, tinubuan na ako ng aking unang set of white hairs. pramis teh!!!!!!

ang ending, nagpunta dito ang globe once, right before christmas, kung kelan naman sumaglit kaming nag-late lunch sa mall sa tabi, and we were gone for like 30 minutes lang. no, they never called my cellphone. the next visit, right before new year, may dumaan daw ulit sabi ng lobby guard pero wala daw tao. e ang jowa was in the banyo naliligo dahil susunod siya sa akin sa riverbanks mall at kasalukuyan akong may student consultation meetings doon, kaya di naman alam kung ano'ng katok ang ginawa nila. again, they never called sa cellphone. hay... okay fine, baka nga naman di narinig dahil nasa banyo, so sige lang...

so eto na, nag-taning na ako. i called up again and dictated na, na hindi ako papasok sa opisina for them from jan 4-7 kaya dapat lumanding sila sa haybol ko sa days na iyon, kundi, i was already set on getting skycable with broadband, and a wireless bayantel landline. okay na ko, naidulog ko na sa universe, at ayoko na sa globe. pero jan 4, aba dumating, isang gusgusin-looking repairman at 6.30pm, naka-tsinelas. okay, inayos niya naman ang phone, at di ko talaga siya pinaalis hangga't di ko nache-check lahat ng kelangan i-check: incoming, outgoing, internet. all go. sige, lusot, alis na siya. all is good. farmville ako buong magdamag.

until the next day.

dahil nga sa gabi siya nag-repair at ang phone line box ko ay nasa loob ng kuwartong dark-colored walls, aba, nung umaga ko lang nakita na ang pag-yank pala niya sa aking phone box ay hindi maingat, at sa kasamaang palad, natuklap ng bonggang-bonga ang malinis at makinis na paint job ng wall ko. punyeta talaga. madilim kasi yung wall na iyon nung gabi dahil nasa gilid ng kama, kaya ayun... hay. naglunod na lang ako sa sine, chocolate mousse at isaw para mawala ang bad trip ko.

pero di pa diyan nagtatapos ito. dahil kinabukasan, biglang nawala naman ang net connection ko sa kalagitnaan ng aking surfing. at mga 2-3 days ko ring kinalabog ang aking techie friend na si roda for help, na nakatulong naman nung una, pero sa paglaon, pareho na kaming namisteryosohan sa prublema (pero i still love you roda just the same!!!! ililibre kita margarita sa susunod na pagkikita!)... until i tried to do a simple thing kanina right before this post. yung internet cable na naka-rekta from globe modem to my wifi router sa lan1 slot, i tried to put sa lan2 slots (kasi hanggan lan4 ang slots doon), wala lang, nothing to lose, and tatataaaaaaaaaaaaaan! eto na. tanga na me. haggard na u? okay na ang broadband life ko. kaya makakapag-blog na naman ako ng walang katapusan.

hayyyyyyyyyyst.

but wait, there's more!!!!!

aba hindi pa tapos ang pagtutuos sa globe!

as soon as the globe gusgusin guy fixed our phone last monday, i immediately went to sm marikina the next day with my mom to ensure that i will not be billed for the past month that they activated my phone (dec 5-7) until the time they actually repaired my phone (jan 4). too late kasi, dahil naka-receive ako ng automatically-generated phone bill covering november to december 09 asking me to pay my bill package worth 1k something. e gago ba sila, wala ngang phone line that time, e. ano babayaran ko? this is war!!!

in fairness naman to them, by november, right after we received that change of number letter, we received a billing statement enumerating their Globe Bangon Pinoy rebate package, and they gave us rebates na binawas-bawas sa supposed bills namin at the time na walang serbisyo, at ang sumatutal nga ng sa akin, may extra pa akong 400 pesos na sobrang binigay sa akin bilang rebate. tinawagan ko pa ang globe twice to check and recheck this, and to ensure na wala na talaga akong pending amount to pay, aside from studying and scrutinizing the itemized rebate billing statements they gave, which all looked proper and in order. wala naman daw akong utang o babayaran. so happiness, right? wrong!!!

when i went to sm marikina last monday, this newbie-looking customer service guy was assigned to me, at eto ang sample conversation namin.

siya: how can i help po?

me: kahapon lang ako nakabitan ulit ng linya kaya gusto kong ipa-adjust itong latest billing statement ko dahil wala naman ako dapat bayaran during this time.

kalikot siya sa computer, take notes-take notes, for 7 minutes. then...

siya: mam, eto po ang mga billing statements ng account ninyo, at may utang pa po kayong 400something pesos, dahil hindi niyo po nabayaran sa cut-off ninyong sept 12 to sept 26 na nag-ondoy.

me: huwat??? e ilang beses kong tinawagan ang globe, a, at sinabing wala na akong pending payment.

siya: ito po yung nakalagay sa account niyo, o (hinarap ang computer monitor sa akin).

me: e may rebate nga ako that time e, at may extra 400 pa ako sa inyo, so dapat mag-zero balance yun, kung may utang akong 400 at kayo may binigay na 400 sa akin, di ba? e wala naman yang utang na sinasabi mo sa any of my bill statements.

at this point, inulit-ulit kong tanungin kung nasaan yung sinasabi niyang utang at itinuturo niya ang isang accounting scheme na hindi lumabas ever sa mga statements ko. ever.

me: bakit ngayon ko lang nakita iyan? bakit wala iyan sa past two bills ko? saan niyo hinugot iyan? bayad na ako sa lahat, a!

siya: mam, i-disregard niyo na lang po ang last two bills ninyo dahil ito po ang mas tama. mali po kasi iyan.

me: ano????? paano naging mali ito????

siya: masyado pong mataas kasi ang naibigay sa inyong rebate kaya negative 400 pesos ang nakalagay sa account ninyo, kaya tignan niyo yung latest bill, nagdagdag sila ng 600 pesos na positive, para mawala yung negative.

true enough, may 600 pesos additional service doon covering nov-dec 09, basic phone package amount daw ito -- sa panahong walang teleponong gumagana sa akin!!!!!! nubahhhhhhh!

me: huh???? ano???? e bakit nila ako bibigyan ng mataas na rebate tapos babawiin din later?

eto ang tumbling niyang sagot.

siya: mam kaya nga po kami nandito para itama ang mga mali sa statement ninyo at para sagutin ang mga concerns ninyo.

me: ano??? ang sinasabi mo, may mali kayong ginawa, tapos kayo din ang tatama sa mali ninyo???

siya: opo.

me: ano'ng logic nun? e bakit kami ang magsa-suffer kung may prublema pala kayo!

siya: kaya nga po i-disregard niyo na lang ang last two statements ninyo kasi mali yun. ito pong nasa computer ang tama.

me: alam mo, parang walang logic ang explanation mo. bakit mali ang binibigay sa aming statements?

siya: hindi po perfect ang system.

ay naku, teh, makailang ulit kaming umikot sa mga ito, kaya after 30 minutes, i simply gave up, paid the damn 400 pesos daw na utang ko, and just made sure they won't bill me again for an absent phone service.

potah, sa bata ko pang ito, dahil lang sa kanila kaya ako tinubuan ng white hairs! tangeeena.

asar.

tapos ang pagtatapos, di pa pala nila in-activate lahat ng features sa package ko, namely the direct distance dialing, so i can't make calls to cellphones and long distance calls.

hay buhay sa pilipinas, hangsayasayaaaaaaa!

kaloka.

parang sarap tuloy mag-migrate, hane? parang masaya talaga sa vancouver...

ewan.

siya, iwan ko na muna ito ang magcho-chocolate mousse muna ulit akoh.

ay, happy new year nga pala.