how long 'til my soul gets it right?

originally posted at my downelink blog
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there's a thin line between pleasing yourself and pleasing someone else.

how do you tow the line if we both have monsters beneath our beds?

each life has its place. but how do i place mine in yours, and yours in mine?

what makes you think i can start clean-slated? the hardest to learn was the least complicated. it still holds: i'm looking for baggage that goes with mine. weren't you?

i know it's not easy to say "take a chance on me" but i did, and so did you. but when i say i'm gonna do my best and it's ain't no lie, i mean it. you already put me to the test, you already let me try. what happened, then?

i don't know if you'll ever understand why. it's like this: if my life were important i would ask -- will i live or die? but i know the answers lie far from this world. will you close every door to me?

you're not alone. sometimes i doubt it, too. time and time again i've said that i don't care, that i'm immune to gloom, that i'm hard through and through. but every time it matters all my words desert me so anyone can hurt me, and they do... do you understand?

the past is gone but something might be found to take its place. do you believe that? i do. when i found you, i was caught in between all i wish for and all i need. and i love you for it. yes, this is how you remind me of what i really am. can you read my mind? do you know what it is you do to me?

i am not as brave as you. when everything's made to be broken, i just want you to know who i am. we're after the same rainbow's end, waiting round the bend.

so where am i in you? i know where you are in me. when you gonna make up your mind? when you gonna love you as much as i do? just a reminder: there's really no day but today. if you need to be loved, here i am, read my mind. you and i could belong to each other.

so what happens now? where am i going to?

don't ask anymore...

*

sige, magsimba ka na. ipagdasal mo na lang ako. sana makakuha ka rin ng kaliwanagan sa sarili mong dilim. hindi ito kontes ng padiliman. iisa lang naman ang hitsura nating lahat kapag walang ilaw. pare-pareho tayong magkakapaan. ang tanong, kaya mo bang sumabay sa lakbay na walang gabay? handa ka bang tanggapin na ang paraan at proseso ng paglalakbay at paggabay ay magkakaiba para sa iba't ibang tao?...









[thanks to my mp3 player for this entry. and to the great songwriters who contribute to the daily soundtrack of my life.]