22 February 2005

stop

sometimes, it takes a new habit to break an old habit. it also takes new memories to blot out old ones. sometimes, a moment of silence brings the loudest noise in your head. sometimes, it's peacefully comforting to remain in the middle of a chaotic aural experience.

what do you call these? ironies? contrasts? i'm not sure. all i know is that sometimes, feelings jump out from your heart as if they do not belong there. you thought they did, but they don't. or they thought they did, but you don't.

sometimes, some feelings take a long time to melt. they get calcified outside the chambers of the heart, perhaps to the point of being fossilized. not exactly inside, just around it. does that count for being melancholic? or being hopeful? i don't know. i don't really know. sometimes i think i am short circuiting. sometimes i think i think too much. sometimes i just want to stop. stop.

stop.

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