30 September 2008

rediscovering the dark side

originally posted at my downelink site, like last year pa (11/16/07 to be exact) pero hindi ko pa pala nare-repost dito. so here it is.

still holds true, up to now. yep, up to now :).

ang sarap pala ng feeling na kinikilig. kasi, to tell you the truth, i never experienced that yet, in my whole 35 years of existence. grabeh. kakaiba. hay...

anyway, here:

-----------------------------------------------------

the good side about the dark side

when i was with my co-workers on a kinda field trip of UPLB, we stopped by the university to buy some favorites from the dairy bar. this is where those famous milk products were sold. we also bought some obligatory los banos goodies like buko pie. well, at least they did, because i hate buko pie. i'm a pie lover, but not buko, sorry. they also bought kesong puti but i'm not also a fan of that kind of cheese (but i can eat brie and camembert forever - ang sosyal ko no? arte!) so i didn't buy any.

what i did buy, out of curiosity, was a quart of chocolate milk in a plastic bag container. it looked simple enough and it was cheap, and i always loved sampling different types of choco milk drinks.

it was my first time to see that dairy bar and to buy that choco milk, and i was such a dufus not to buy a lot of that. man, i tell you, it was the most delicious chocolate milk i've ever tasted in my life! no exag! grabe lang sa heaven ang sarap! yummy!

when we were waiting for the others to finish with their purchase, my boss asked what i bought, and she recommended that i also buy the fresh milk. i said nope, i ain't the white milk type o' gal, and i said i loved chocolate. just like with chocolate bars, i liked the dark chocolate more than the milk chocolate, because it was a bit bitter and not so sweet.

my boss made a remarkable observation. "oh, so you really like dark things." i said "yup, in chocolate, and in my women! hahaha!" she laughed, and i said "that's why latina-looking women are the best!" and she said that indeed, i do like them dark. and she said that if she were ever a lesbian like me, then probably she would also love darker-skinned women, or at least brown-skinned like ours. no caucasians, no whiteness, none of that for us. for me, especially.

i don't know what's with this country. it's preoccupied with whiteness lately. i don't understand why the women don't appreciate the golden brown skin that we have, that it's a great color and skin tone, and man, it just looks delicious to me! hehehe. i dunno, but i have never been attracted to fair-skinned girls no matter how pretty they are. that's why i'm never into chinese-type women or mestiza women (even if i do look like this too). maybe i'm looking for someone who will complement me, i dunno. or maybe i'm looking for someone who looks better than me. yeah, i believe brown-skinned women look better than me. we call it "kayumanggi" which is like golden brown.

to backtrack, yeah, most of my ex-girlfriends have dark skin. variations - dark, golden brown, rather exotic, as a friend once commented. when he saw my second girlfriend he said "you really like exotic looking women, no?" and i never thought about that until the girlfriend i had next to that one also had golden brown skin, but she didn't look exotic, though.

hmmm. my taste in women, in chocolate, in milk -- all dark. as for wine, i prefer red over white. in colors, i prefer earth and dark tones rather than white or bright ones. i hate the daytime and i love the nighttime. what does that say about me?

that was a new way to see "the dark" or liking the dark, as my boss said. a new twist on things, or new twist on how those words sound to me now.

yeah, indeed, i really like the dark side. and that is good.


---------------------------------------------

share share lang. :) maulan ang gabi, at may malayong nilalang, kaya kahit sa salita o isip man lamang, magpang-abot. kahit saglit.

Pride March 2008 call for graphics

from our friends at the Task Force Pride network, of which i am a member (of the media committee). if you're interested, please get in touch with the person identified below, not me.

feel free to repost this. thanks!



---------------------

Below is an invitation to volunteer your talent and creativity to Task Force Pride (TFP), the network of lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender organizations and individuals that has been organizing the annual Pride March in Manila since 1999. The call is being made by our fabulous and gorgeous Finance and Marketing Committee Head, Ms. Dee Mendoza.



Calling all Graphic Artists:

This year’s Manila Pride March will be the 10th. To mark this milestone, the ExeCom Members of Task Force Pride (TFP) 2008 plan to have a commemorative 10th year identity in line with the theme A decade of dignity: Our rights, our lives, our loves, our selves.

This commemorative emblem/logo will stand side-by-side the TFP logo. It will be used in all print/online collaterals, such as flyers, banners, posters, website, etc.

TFP, being a voluntary organization, will only be able to award the bragging rights to the winner. :) The winner must also waive the copyrights of the emblem/logo and shall not hold TFP under any copyright infringement violation.


Mechanics:

1. We suggest that this identity play with the number 10 or a stylized form of it.

2. It can be a single color or more.

3. If colored, please render it in black and white, as well.

4. Please render the logo in high-resolution for ease of printing when rendered in large format.

5. One person may submit one or more entries.

6. Upon submission, please include your name, mobile number and email address.



Deadline for submission of entries will be on October 5, 2008. Email entries to divamanila@yahoo. com.

For questions, please feel free to call me at 0918.250.7470.

Please feel free to pass this call-out.

Thank you,

Dee Mendoza

Finance and Marketing Committee Head

TFP 2008

tumbling sa definitions

been lurking at friendster lesbian groups (meron pala nun!) for some time now because i have been studying this online phenomenon of "the clan" chorvalu sa younger lesbian circles. i wanna update myself kasi on the scene and this is one way of doing it, at isusulat ko siya in the future. ay basta, academic ito eheheh.

anyway, sa mga groups, may forums at may isang nag-post ng topic na ito. merits reposting kasi tumambling ako sa mga definitions.

hey anj, inspiration for the next next next dd hehe.


------------------------------------------

tell me what type are you?
beacause im 100% sure that i'm BUTCH Laughing


Butch=Tomboy(TB)
Butch is the english term for Tomboy
Butch is Female Who
Dress Up=Male
Attitude=Male
Love Femme Only

Femme=Tomgirl(TG)
Femme is the english term for Tomgirl
Femme is Female who
dress up=female..
Attitude=Female...
They Love Butch ONLY

Lessy
Lessy is female who
dress up=female...
Attitude=female...
Love Lessy Only

Andro
Female who are stuck in between becoming Butch Or Femme...
Somehow,they can love Butch,Femme and Lessy
Can dress up like Guys or Gals if they want...

Andro Butch
This is Female who is andro but more to butch...
that means they look more masculin...
And love Andro Femme or Femme....
She might be a little bit like Femme

Andro Femme
Female who is andro but more to femme...
that means they look more feminin...
and love andro Butch or Butch..
she might be a little bit like butch

Dyke
Female who have female figure....
Long hair...However..She's a butch!(Attitude like butch...)

Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

kalurkey di ba?

eto ang sagot ko sa thread:


i am queer.

i'm none of the above. i see myself as a woman who loves another woman, even if i don't look very feminine or womanly -- because my looks are my self-expression, and it has no gender or sexual orientation.

and i don't want a woman who thinks she is a man. sorry if that offends some here. kanya-kanya lang pong taste. respecting each other.

peace!

----------------------------------------------------------

hm, tignan natin. baka jombagin ako ng mga fafa.

la lang. trying to instill something different. i'm seeing how they'll react.

it's a social experiment. ang saya-saya! heheh :P

kayo, what type are you? hihihihihi.


28 September 2008

goldstars

happy pala ito. :)

wala lang.

this one, originally posted at my downelink account:

-----------------------
jellyfish
(for goldstar)

that signature smile
covered playfully
with that
shy palm
of yours
killed me tonight
hitting straight where
it should not matter
the most
these days

it's guarded;
supposed to be...

supposed to be.

weakening knees abound
shaking voices fluttered
piercing stares avoided

that was in the
beginning

a kiss or two shared
holding hands patted
pained souls bared

that was at the
end

still, we remain
not at ease
perhaps distanced
by the past
fencing in
the present
to avoid
future mistakes

after all,
we know how it is
to scratch that itch
that the sting of that kind
leaves in our skins

...and hearts.

still, we bear it.

and we bare.

we bared.
--------------------------

next stop, la union. who wants to go surfing?

20 September 2008

bakit ang mahal magpunta sa tagaytay?

some thoughts lang before i sleep.

i got some email replies today about tariff chorvas sa iba't ibang places sa tagaytay. akala ko naman mas mura ng di hamak dahil ito ang iniisip kong alternative sa baguio trip sana. huwag ka. sky high. mas mainam pa atang mag-baguio na lang ang byuti ko. sobra lang!

what i want is a simple single-room occupancy chorva with a view of something nice, preferably the taal chorva or whatnot doon. eh ang mahal potah. yung mura, wala namang view. hay. hirap.

may alam ka ba? pachika nga. kainis...

hmp. baka baguio rin kalabasan ko nito if ever. arrrrr.

gusto ko na magsulaaaaaaaaat!

*

just came from a shoot today. buti na lang pala at na-move ang editing for the upcentennial chorva to tomorrow. kung hindi, libay lupaypay ang drama ko ngayon. lurlur to the max, mega-lotlot itey. hay. pero tiredness pa rin. the shoot involved moving vehicles kasi, notably motorcycles (yes, dalawa sila) and a van. heraf. pero excited din ako makita kasi we have a new sfx guy on board, and i like the way he works. okay naman. ma-discuss ang lolo. i like that. e dapat lang naman e!

*

lesson learned din: don't party in malate with lgbt peeps the night before a shoot hehe. leaves you with a few hours of sleep lang. owenu! fun fun fun lang sa bed kagabi e. i miss club dancing like that. been ages! well, weeks actually ehehehe.

launch ng invoice magazine kahapon. tumambling lang ang predominantly gay crowd when the lezpinay dancers came out and, er, did their thang. hahaha! funny ito! nalibugan ata ang mga bakla sa sayaw na pangbyaning. hehehe char.

hay... so many gay guys, so few of us... lagi naman e. as my former isis boss once said, napakaliit ng letter L sa lgbt sa events na ganito. well... sayang. kung may third dimension pa ngayon, hane? ang sasaya lang ng mga araw na yon...

oh well...

but i had fun last night. was with friends, and that's what matters. happy kami. dance dance. yebah! sa susunod ulit. next stop: government!

o yung mga nais sumama diyan ha, maghanda na kayo hehehe. choz. pride season is on its way na, kaya dadami na naman ang ganitong mga chevers.

it's yay to be gay!

18 September 2008

bakit bawal ang mani sa shoot?

konting aside lang sa trabaho today.

got this in my academic work email today. natawa ako hahaha. merits reposting.

-----------------------------
Dear Ma'am Libay:

I am _____, a sophomore Broadcast Communication major. As a requirement for Broadcast Communication 100 (Introduction to Broadcasting) under Prof. ____, my groupmates and I are currently doing a study which aims to find the etymology and rationale behind the media practice of the prohibition of eating peanuts during production.

In line with this, we would li
ke to interview you regarding this tradition. We have learned from some of your Film 112 students that you are implementing this practice. Any knowledge that you can share with us regarding this would help a lot in our study.

Thank you very much, and we look forward to your favorable response.
-------------------------------



hm, bakit nga ba?

i never told my class that i am implementing this practice. pag naalala ko lang, saka ako nagre-react. hindi siya rule pero ayoko ring labagin kumbaga. mahirap na no. minsan, kakambal ng production ang murphy's law.

huwag. na. huwag.

nadatnan ko na ang praktis na ito sa shooting ng pelikula noon pa. 13 years old pa lang ako, tumatambay na ako sa rpn9/ch13 studios diyan sa lampas sa balara malapit sa peyups, at narinig ko iyan dati sa set ng soap operang tinatambayan ko dun. pero siyempre di naman tumatak sa akin ito.

fast forward to 1994. sa set ng isang music video shoot kung saan intern ako. nabanggit din ito ng ibang crew na kasabay kong pumapaypay ng uling na may baby oil (for lowtech fog machine fx). wala lang.

kahit mula 1992-1995 na nag-aaral na ako ng film and audiovisual communication sa peyups (matapos layasan ang fine arts), naririnig ko na ito sa mga kasamahan kong kaklase sa shoot-shoot namin. isa sa laging sinasabi, bawal magdala ng mani sa shoot. any junk food except for that. wala lang.

hanggang sa magtrabaho na ako sa pelikula, sa premiere productions, noong 1996. narinig ko na naman yan, lalo na sa set ng shinu-shoot naming pelikula ni cesar montano na si joel lamangan ang direktor. at pati sa iba pang set ng pelikulang shinu-shoot namin na hulma ng kung sinu-sinong direktor, narinig ko rin ito. wala lang.

ewan ko ba. sabi ni cenon, myth lang daw ito na pinauso ng isang OC na ayaw ng makalat sa set sa shoot.

bakit nga ba malas? ewan ko. kung magawan nga nila ng trace history ito, aba e gusto ko mabasa yun!

hehehe.

baka yung iba diyan, may alam o teorya. comment!

la lang.

okay back to work.

huy! ikaw din. :P

14 September 2008

just enjoying the afternoon...

kahit naiba ang plans ko sa buhay ever. pero as always, happy ako sa changes. dapat lang.

sabi ng stars today:

Taurus Horoscopes

Sunday, Sep 14th, 2008 -- You may have a very specific idea of what you want to do today. You might even think that any deviation from your plan means that you cannot be happy, but nothing could be further from the truth. Your view of reality could actually be a bit distorted now, so don't be too concerned if the day unfolds very differently than you imagined.



o di ba? ayan na nga, relaxed na ko. kahit papaano. ten days to go and it's all over. and i will be reborn anew. at puwede nang rumampang muli.

yebah!

and to further relax me, i read lately. ulit. yay! more pa more pa! more time to read. ah!

i just posted a review of audre lorde's book zami sa multiply. check it out. happy yung book. read!

12 September 2008

i am by nature a fictionist...

something to share before i sleep.

---------


No time

I have
no time
to be
lonely.

People
talk
to me--
kids,
adults,
kids rushing
to be adults,
adults behaving
like kids.

Everyone.

I have
no time
for
self-pity.

People
approach
my art--
be creative
be productive
be meaningful
be insightful--
one could
only do
those things
when properly
motivated.

Properly.

I have
no time
for
shallowness.

People
more meaningful
than shallow ones
value
my time,
engage
my presence,
making
my time
more worthwhile.

Worthwhile.

Thus,

I have
no time
for you
you who
toy with
me
you who
approach me
because I am
of some use
to you
for you
do not
ever
contact me
because
my time
is more
precious
spent
without you
by my side.

Without.


08sept08 mon 11.23a

facebooking

malapit ko na atang iwan ang friendster.

sinusubukan ko itong facebook e. la lang. na-engganyo at naintriga ako finally when i read that article link na pinost ni cai from the intl herald tribune analyzing the changing landscape of people's online community presence and such. basta. maganda siyang article. thought-provoking.

kakatawa kasi when i opened that account, biglang may instant 9 invites na palang naghihintay sa akin. so ayun, naadik ako sa paghanap ng mga friends and colleagues ko doon. at naroon pala halos sila lahat! aha! mabuti naman. konek-konek ulit. hapi.

ehehe yun lang.

*

bumabawi ang mga divas today ha! in fairness. so okay na ko.

o sha. kabyaningan mode muna. see you at the dyke dialogues bukas! i'll be the one wearing yellow. enjoy ang tshirt ko bukas hihihi :P

oo talagang pinaghandaan ang wardrobe! hahaha choz.

*

reconnected with college friends last night. happy naman :) grabe, how time flies. at madami akong natutunang new life skills, salamat kay olga hihihi :P

at may bago na kaming tatambayang mga lugar for more, ehem, psycho-anthropological participatory
communication research hehe (read: gimik!).

humanda ang makati! hahaha! chos :P

*

at hindi po ako nagda-diet pills kaya ako namamayat, tulad ng ilang nababalita tungkol sa kinauukulan.

magaling lang ako mag-manage ng kung ano ang ipapasok ko sa bibig ko lately.

basta. hehe.

*

intl book fair sa smx this weekend. punta tayo!!! shyet now you know where my money will go. andun ako sunday, pakalat-kalat. kitakits!

aside lang. napapansin niyo ba yung mga waiting sheds sa qc na nagpu-promote ng reading/pagbabasa? natutuwa ako dun. una kong napansin to sa katips papunta peyups. all over na pala. ang kyut. good idea. we should pull the newer generations to read, and the others who are not yet into it. a person who doesn't read books is...well, major turnoff sa akin. kahit sandamakmak ang subscriptions niya sa mga magazines and such. yes, kahit time and newsweek pa yan, ineng, wit. pero sabagay, depende nga yan sa kinds of books na binabasa ng tao. kung puro poplit... sana mahaluan ng ibang klaseng lit din and such. turnoff din kasi kung puro ganun. anyway, too much of something is always not good anyway. teka i'm digressing na ata hehe.

anyway, i mentioned that nga pala sa aking column this week. i mean the book fair.

read here. more of ICW's pistang panitik event here.

*

wiihiii natutuwa ako as mga recent turn of events sa isang karaketan. yay! la lang : talking to myself. don't mind me.

sa panahon ngayon, kelangan marunong ka kumita ng pera.

ng legal.

10 September 2008

when i am tired of being a person...

sometimes it tires me, to be a person
especially when i have to be civil to other persons
who do not act like they deserve
the title of being called "human being"
precisely because they are not humane
nor are they beings with interesting facets
merely entities that bother your realities
we all have our own idiosyncracies to deal with
so please, please and pretty, pretty please
do not throw your neuroses at me
and learn how to deal with your own shit
in your own goddamn backyard.

[apologies to pablo neruda]

*

yes, galit ang lola niyo. imbey!


*

sometimes, when older people get to me, i refocus myself on why i am here: for the younger people.

so up yours, mga tanders kayo. pweh!

oo galit talaga ako. buset.

down with divas.


*

and a note to self i wrote last monday, after being trapped at the side of vargas museum by the onslaught (literal!) of that pesky bagyo.


a geometry of thoughts


picture this...

three girls stranded at the side of a museum
trapped by rain, wind and the absence of umbrellas
scared of thunderclaps, croaking frogs and murmuring guards
fused at the vortex of various angles of discussion

insights framed words and plans and fears
plucking wisdom from above, below and inside
we all have our tendencies to wallow
in our own little worlds of needs

in the end, we agree to agree
never mind the naysayers, we bellow
mea culpa caveat emptor non sequitur -- chorva!
basta ang ending, lagi kaming maganda!

yun na!

:)


*

pag okay na ko, uwi na ko...

just shaking off some shyettt. ayokong iuwi ang nega energies na ganito e. it ruins my beauty sleep. char!

08 September 2008

FREE EVENT: GLobal Lens Film Series Sept 10-12

Asia Society & UPFI hold the
Global Lens Film Series Screenings


Asia Society and UP Film Institute present six critically acclaimed Asian films from the Global Lens Collection. Established by the Global Film Initiative in 2004, the series aims to promote cross-cultural understanding by providing moviegoers with access to critically-acclaimed films from developing countries.

The selection gives audiences a glimpse into the lives of ordinary men and women across the region. Helmed by some of the most engaging storytellers in Asia today, these films show Asia in all its diversity – taking viewers through lush landscapes and gritty urban skylines to experience each country’s unique cultural nuances and social concerns.

Screenings and discussions of the Global Lens Collection will be held at the UP Film Institute on September 10, 11 and 12. Admission is free. For film schedules, please contact 926 3640 (UP Film Institute) or 7524374 (Asia Society).


The Global Lens Film Series
September 10:
4pm, Ishmael Bernal Galley, cocktail opening

5pm, UPFI Cine Adarna: Border CafƩ (Iran, 2005, Kambozia Partovi)

7pm, UPFI Cine Adarna: Buffalo Boy (Vietnam, 2004, Nguyen-VĆ“ Nghiem-Minh)


September 11:

5pm, UPFI Cine Adarna: Of Love and Eggs (Indonesia, 2004, Garin Nugroho)

7pm, UPFI Cine Adarna: Dam Street (China, 2005, Li Yu)


September 12:

4:30 pm, UPFI Videotheque: The Bet Collector (Philippines, 2006, Jeffrey Jeturian)

6pm, Ishmael Bernal Gallery: Global Lens Forum with Prof. Patrick Campos and

Mr. Jeffrey Jeturian; followed by a screening of

Let the Wind Blow (India, 2004, Partho Sen-Gupta)


The Global Lens Collection

Border CafƩ (Iran, 2005, Kambozia Partovi)

A young widow takes over her late husband's truck stop cafƩ, keeping hidden in the kitchen so as not to cause a scandal in Iran's conservative society. But her brother-in-law, out of familial obligation, wants to take her as a wife and also take over the cafƩ. Meanwhile a Greek trucker who is a frequent cafƩ customer, is slowly entranced - at first by her sublime cooking ability, and then by her.

Buffalo Boy (Vietnam, 2004, Nguyen-VĆ“ Nghiem-Minh)

In this powerful coming-of-age story set in rural 1940s Vietnam, a young man takes up with a rough band of nomadic buffalo herders and discovers freedom, violence and love - but also secrets about his past that will change his life forever.

Dam Street (China, 2005, Li Yu)

In the early–1980s, Xiao Yun—a sixteen year–old girl living in small riverside town in China—discovers she is pregnant. In the aftermath, her boyfriend leaves her, and she gives birth and is then forced to put her child up for adoption. Ten years later, Xiao Yunn is reduced to working as a singer in a local song and dance troupe. And her only real companion is Xiao Yong, a fiercely affectionate boy who protects her from the critical eyes of the community until a marriage proposal discovers the limits of their friendship, and the depth of her unresolved past.

Let the Wind Blow (India, 2004, Partho Sen-Gupta)

At the height of nuclear tensions between India and Pakistan, Arjun and his best friend, Chabia, weigh their options for the future against the reality of life on the streets of Mumbai. Enticed by the promise of wealth and opportunity in the Persian Gulf, Chabia is eager to leave his job as a mechanic. But for Arjun, who must finish college and care for his mother, the decision is not so easy in director Partho Sen-Gupta's gritty, apocalyptic interpretation of Krishna's counsel to Arjuna, from the Bhagavad Gita.

Of Love and Eggs (Indonesia, 2004, Garin Nugroho)

The ever-surprising Garin Nugroho, angered by a Muslim cleric's call for the banning of a comedy for teenagers, responds by making a censor-proof movie about a working-class community in Jakarta during the Lebaran holiday. Shot entirely in the studio), it lovingly recreates the tone, style and pastel hues of an Indonesian comedy from the heyday of the studio system. his film brings this gentle humor to complex relationships between parents and children, and to social and religious issues of life in and around a Jakarta mosque, through the eyes and voices of children, and the powerful imagery of a prayer rug, young love—and eggs.

The Bet Collector (Philippines, 2006, Jeffrey Jeturian)

Amy, the family matriarch, makes ends meet by running a small convenience store out of her home. But in a struggling economy customers are scarce, and without the help of her husband or pregnant daughter, she is forced to supplement the family income by collecting bets for an illegal numbers game. In this starkly realistic narrative, director Jeffrey Jeturian presents a captivating portrait of a once-proud woman, haunted by memories of a dead son and hounded by the police, and her fragile and lonely life as a kubrador (bet collector) on the streets of Manila.


###

About Asia Society

Asia Society in the Philippines was established in 1999 with a mission to promote understanding of Asia through education. Asia Society presents the uniqueness and diversity of Asian cultures through lectures, exhibitions, films, seminars, conferences, and travel study tours. Asia Society Philippines is a non-profit foundation accredited by the Philippine Council for NGO Certification (PCNC) and is supported by membership contributions from foundations, institutions, corporations, and individuals. All donations made to Asia Society Philippines are tax deductible.

To become involved in Asia Society projects, please call (632)7524374 or (632)8108983

The University of the Philippines Film Institute (UPFI) is the first and only degree-granting academic film institution in the country. It is also the only Philippine-member of the International Association of Film and Television Schools (CILECT). For inquiries on events and screenings, contact UPFI at 926-2722/926-3640.

07 September 2008

more chicha

mga blast from the past and kinda near past, and the heres and nows. ayuz.


GO FISH
(1994)
d. rose troche
s. rose troche, guinevere turner

pitch: college and post-college lesbians bond, face issues of their community, and help those who need help in the love department find love despite their eccentricities

catch: wala. this film is perfect. pramis

and that it is. i remember watching this a long time ago and ending up liking it. more than ten years after, as i watched it again, i find myself loving it.

and why shouldn't i? the lesbians here are of my generation, mga kasabayan ko, perhaps in sexuality moda and in creativity, too. the way the film was shot, with all those quirky experimental in-betweeners sandwiched sa more normative scenes and all, huwaw, may tatak nga kami, in fairness. at hindi lang sa pagiging lebsiyana ito. the style reminds me of darren arronofsky's earlier style, isa ko pang kahenerasyon although syempre iba ang filmmaking focus niya.

simple lang itong film. no more than a little over an hour, pero puno at satisfying sa kuwento, iyon ay kung lesbiyana ka. i don't think they made this film for non-lesbians, pero those who get it are okay. it means may openmindedness na nangyayari. that's how i see it.

hay grabe. nakakatuwa at nakakatawa na ganun pa rin ang concerns natin after more than a decade --finding love chorva. hindi talaga ata ito magbabago bilang the
matic framework, ng buhay at ng sining. well, okay naman ako don. :)

hay. wala na akong masabi... basta. there must be some strange reason why i boug
ht this film and watched it at the time i did, in some kind of lesbianic divine intervention kind of way. yes, the universe has a funny way of reminding you that you are okay.

grabe.

and that, i am.



ITTY BITTY TITTY COMMITTEE
(2007)
d. jamie babbit

pitch: a pre-college student working in a plastic surgeon's office finds love and radical feminist advocacy in a girl who's a member of the appropriately termed group CIA or Clits in Action (i'm not making this up!)

catch: it feels amateurish at times, and not in a good way

fast forward to 13 years since GO FISH and we still get independently-produced films shot in a quirky, edgy way, with characters spewing lines of advocacy of a feminist and lesbian nature. nice. nga lang, mas maganda ang handling ng GO FISH sa ganun, at ito hindi.

maganda naman sana ang kuwento, something that should be close to my heart. er, bosom din. the lead character, a kinda prim and proper chicana who is so out to her loving family, works as an assistant in a plastic surgeon's office known for good boob jobs. nawindangers lang ang life ng family niya when she joined nga this radical group with chicks wearing black leather jackets. hay, at yun na ang start ng prublema -- na minsan naman, para kasing walang prublema yung characters, na pilit lang sinaksakan ng prublema. hay labo, lalo na yung nag-a-angst-angst na si chicana na parang wala sa rason o tamang katinuan, script-wise. tapos yung object of affection niya na kept woman ng isang tanders na feministang may sariling NGO chorva (um, shades of lola darkness ito, minus the evilness hehehehe). hay basta, ang daming malabo kaya sometimes it feels so amateurish. parang di pa tapos ayusin at i-rewrite at workshop-in yung script e shinoot na. it felt that way.

hay. sayang. the title was a catch for me kaya ko to binili. well.. take the good with the bad, i suppose. and no amount of cameos will save this film, kahit pa man sina clea duvall yan o si jenny shimizu.



PUCCINI FOR BEGINNERS
(2006)
d., s. maria maggenti
c. justin kirk, gretchen mol, elisabeth reaser

pitch: a lesbian new york writer, fresh from a break-up, finds herself having relations with a man and a woman at the same time, not knowing that the two were lovers

catch: wala! happy din ito! biased ako e bakit ba hahahaha

this one's another good one ha. kakaaliw siya. i love justin kirk esp in ANGELS IN AMERICA and in LOVE! VALOUR! COMPASSION! buwisit yun kasi sa lahat ng mabibigyan ng nominations for acting sa ANGELS, siya wala! bad trip! e role niya kaya yung may pinaka-bearing dun, haller. oh well.

katuwa itong film. nakakatuwa kasi feeling ko, halaw sa tunay na buhay ng writer-director hahaha. i read somewhere na maggenti's not identifying as a woman-loving-woman daw kasi lately, which is kinda ironic, coming from directing another pivotal lesbian film in the 90s called THE INCREDIBLY TRUE ADVENTURES OF TWO GIRLS IN LOVE. yes, that film kung saan semi-baby butch pa si tina, yung actress sa THE L WORD. yes, siya yun! look at the eyes. they have the same blank stare.

feeling ko ganun nga ang film. isang biyaning na malaki ang commitment issues kaya napasok sa isang masalimuot na hetero at homo relationship at the same time, kasi nagpapatianod lang siya. eto yung mga may rason sa buhay na "it just happened..." like "bakit mo ko pinagpalit? bakit ka nainlab sa iba?" at ang sagot sa iyo ay "it just happened..." hanlabo. nakakainis kung tutuusin pero i let it go kasi kyut yung actress eheheh. i am biased that way. madali akong bentahan.

ayokong ibigay ang ending pero nakakatuwa naman siya, but not in a star cinema mainstream cinema film type of way. in an indie film type of way and in a lesbianic way din. basta happy siya. nakatulong ang magandang script. ito halatang nagdaan sa pagbubuno ng mga makikilatis na mata at utak, at mabuti ang kinalabasan. winner! watch!





THE THANK YOU GIRLS
(2008)
d., s. charliebebs gohetia

pitch: a group of visayan gay/trans people, whose livelihood is to join gay beaucons, goes on a roadtrip to find their own inner journeys and outer fabulousness despite the odds

catch: a bit longish, could be edited down a bit pa

congrats to upfi student bebs for helming this first full-length of his. maganda ang topic at hindi siya seasonal: mga gay beaucon joiners na ang tawag pala sa kanila e "thank you girls" kasi lagi silang natatalo o hindi nakakaabot ng first place. premise pa lang, panalo na! kakatawa siya hahaha.

nainis lang ako at hindi ako marunong mag-bisaya. gusto ko pa naman maintindihan yung nuance ng gayspeak nila doon kasi kakaiba e. but the subtitles work naman.

what doesn't work is that repeating narrative cycle style sometimes, reminiscent of other nonlinear narrative films like some mexican films na di ko na maalala title, basta andun si gale garcia chorva kyuti. may malaki dapat dahilan kung bakit babalikan ang ikot ng isang parte ng naratibo, at dapat e sa ibang anggulo naman ito i-take. yung nangyari kasi, parang iisang anggulo lang, at tight lang ang isa at yung isa e wider shot. weird lang.

may feel din siya ng PRISCILLA QUEEN OF THE DESERT, this aussie film of yore na ganito din ang tema, na ni-ripoff naman ng american film na TO WONG FOO THANKS FOR EVERYTHING JULIE NEWMAR about the same time. inevitable ang comparison kasi road trip ito ng trannies at may eksenang nasa top ng bubong ng jeep at nagpapalipad ng colorful cloth.

the VO also reminds me of Y TU MAMA TAMBIEN na di mo alam kung sino ang nagsasalita tapos marami siyang alam sa buhay ng mga tao sa film. iffy lang na in the end, yung jeep pala ang nagsasalita. siya ang VO. actually, i think it could work better kung walang VO na lang, totally. ngayon ko lang naisip. hm.

pero other than that, masaya naman. the acting was good, the lines are witty and funny, lalo na yung nagpapraktis sila ng mga QnA portion while travelling. pinaka-paborito ko ito:

maitim na vakler: i have a question for you. define darkness.
vakler na nagre-rehearse: darkness is here beside me.

or something like that. hahahaha! basta aliw ito! if only for the lines. hahaha! saka maganda yung kuwento. nga lang, minsan it felt pepered with advocacy, with the beaucon women spewing lines straight out of taskforcepride hahahahah! well, this is good pero it might not be a bit realistic, kasi sa totoo lang, hindi naman masyadong advocacy-aware ang karamihan sa mga beaucon joiners na ganito e. siguro dapat tinimpla lang. i get the point but sana hindi nasobrahan.

all in all, happy ako na sasali ito sa vancouver. sana manalo! congrats guys!

isa pang naalala kong exchange, thanks to lush's blogpost.

vakler 1: okay, here is your question. what is your waistline...and why?

hahahahaha nakakatawa! ang dami pa nito e. basta! watch!!!!!!!!


next time ulit.

DYKE DIALOGUES: Sexual Negotiations sept13

o, kitakits dito ha. keri lang kung wala kang kakilala. chances are, pag dumalo ka dito, may NANAISIN kang makilala hehehehehe :P

the ad sounds a bit serious but trust me, fun ito. like what angie says, it's a good excuse to get together and meet new people outside of the tgoosh-tgoosh noise of exclusive discos.

para iba naman.

may magtitinda ng booze ata. at dildo. ata. ehehehe. lubricant kaya? yung may flavor. eheheheh.

so see you! yes i'll be there. as always.

------------

Know the details of desires. Explore the power play of seduction.

Rainbow-Rights Project, Inc.
in partnership with
Lunduyan ng Sining
and
RADAR Pridewear

invite you to

DYKE DIALOGUES 4: Sexual Negotiations
An Intimate Forum on the Politics of the Artistic and Erotic

September 13, 2008 (Saturday), 1-5 pm
Roofdeck, FBR Building, Katipunan Ave., Quezon City

Open to LGBT community members and supporters.

To confirm attendance, text (0919) 354-0808 or email lunduyanngsining@gmail.com.

Food and drinks are available at the forum proper
This event is part of Lunduyan ng Sining's first anniversary celebration this September.

See you all! :)

06 September 2008

lesbyana lesbyana, isinapelikula ka na naman!

the title is a take-off from an essay i wrote about the lesbian portrayals in philippine cinema, published in this book by the UP Press. wala lang, it's a sunny afternoon (from a rainy morning) and i decided to hole in here to watch some films and now, make reviews. feel ko lang magsulat e. la lang. sama ko na rin yung iba kong napanood dati pa na pinagmuni-munihan ko muna.

chirchiryahan na!



IMAGINE ME & YOU
(2005)

d., w. ol parker

c. lena heady, piper perabo

pitch: a recently married woman gets struck by love at first sight with a lesbian florist, and is torn on what to do

catch: wala! maganda siya! :)


okay, this is no
t the first queer-oriented film that piper appeared in. i liked her first in COYOTE UGLY kahit hindi queer ang character niya, pero napaka-queer lang ng scenario ng film (e kasi mukhang mga tranny performers yung ibang models doon). i liked her in LOST AND DELIRIOUS even if the whole lesbian storyline of that film is soooo whacked! (as in haller, tragic lesbian love na naman, pweh!). i like her here, too, kas siguro okay ang chemistry nila ni lena hedy, who plays the lesbian florist na na-inlababo-han nung just hetero-married character ni piper.

out of the list of films i really want to watch, gusto ko siya simply because of the title hehe. kanta kasi siya, at isa sa kanta na gusto ko mula sa lumang panahon. or more appropriately, first line siya ng kanta ng the turtles entitled "happy together." well, it doesn't really get featured so prominently in the film pero ginamit siyang device in the end kaya nagkitang muli ang would-be lovers na itey, in that star cinema kilig fantasy way.

and that's how the whole film feel
s -- it feels like a star cinema production! palitan mo lang ng hetero loveteam ang lesbian loveteam dito and you get the whole star cinema film shebang: title na halaw sa isang kanta, two gorgeous-looking lead stars, a good storyline with believable characters, humorous sidekicks used as foils (the girl bida's new hubby's promiscuous best man best friend who wanted to bed the lesbian florist), smart wisdom-y things from old characters (piper's dad supportive of her daughter's experience of "love at first sight" despite the homo odds), the mega kilig muntik-nang-maghalikan-pero-idelay-para-kilig moments (at madami ito ha, piper has perfected acting this out haha!), the mega-kilig plant and payoff devices used to make the characters find each other (complete with habulan sa ending kasi papunta sa airport/vacation ang hurt one, na hahabulin ng natauhang loved one at hahabulin yung isa chuva), grabe lang kulang na lang ang credits nito e sabihing directed by olivia lamasan produced by charo santos concio hahahaha! sobrah! all the elements are really there!

kaya siguro gusto ko. kasi it's so mainstream that way (but unlike star, laidback lang ang storytelling at hindi magarbong attention-caller) kaya effective ang kilig moments kasi nakaka-relate ako. finally, a true lesbian kilig film! winner!

hotness si lena heady! yun lang. hehe. i was wondering where i saw her before, and a quick imdb search revealed siya nga pala yung nasa spanish/english film na LLUVIA EN LOS ZAPATOS (the man with rain in his shoes) directed by spanish filmmaker maria ripoll, whom we all met when she went here a couple years ago and we had coffee and cake at the upfi office. tama! at siya rin yung hotness na queen sa testoster
on-y cgi film 300. ayuz. i love lena hehe especially that british accent niya ha. happy siya.

happiness ito. for a hetero guy writer-director, super sensitive ang approach sa materyal na ang ganda. parang non-issue masyado ang pag-switch ng hetero lead girl sa pag-fall in love sa lesbian, kasi given lang na hey, it's love, chever. although masyado lang mabait at madaling natanggap ng husband niya, pero sige kineri na rin ng characterization ng dude, so puwedeng palusutin.

but all in all, okay siya. watch!



NOTES ON A SCANDAL
(2006)

s. from the novel by zoe heller
c. dame judy dench, cate blanchett

pitch: a veteran closeted lesbian high school teacher uses a younger new teacher's scandalous affair with a student to curry favors in her favor

catch: putangina ang homophobic!


bwisit! bwisit ito! nakakairita! arrgghh! sayang ang talents. pero iyon ang ipinagtataka ko: bakit pumayag ang talents na lumabas dito?????????

the film is about hidden scandals, usually frowned upon by society. cate's character is an art teacher in a high school and currently undergoing a seven-year itch sa marriage niya with an older man. si dame judy naman is a closeted lesbian pero alam naman ng lahat ba, yung ganun. she had a previous run-in with another teacher na, it turns out in the end, naging stalkerish ang moda niya at the girl had to issue a restraining order pa sa kanya. tapos heto na naman siya, na-focus-an niya ng affection yung new art teacher na halos i-blackmail niya emotionally pero pa-underground ang dating when the art teacher had a sexual love affair with an underage student. haggard! i'm sure hetero ang sumulat ng novel na ito, and not once binanggit nila ang posibilidad ng sexuality chever ng closeted older teacher. nakakainis kasi napaka-homophobic lang ng buong set-up, not to say na walang lesbyanang closeta man o hindi na mangba-blackmail ng ganun sa isang babae para maging emotionally indebted sa kanya yung gelay. maraming ganyan diyan sus i can name n
ames hahahaha. pero that's not the point. the point is, sobrang condemned na agad ang character ni judy in the beginning, kahit na cate's character was "punished" for punishing the closeted lesbian, pero iffy pa rin ang whole situation, kasi the older teacher ends up beginning something na maaaring ganun ulit sa isang complete stranger in the end. aaaaah basta! ayoko ito. buset. kakainis. argh. sayang talent! asar.




RENT (2005)
d. chris columbus
s. from the broadway musical created by jonathan larson

dop. stephen goldblatt

c. rosario dawson and some of the original broadway cast


pitch: a musical about angsty middle class but kinda poor-ish new york artists living in tenement housing chever

catch: er, nasan ang ibang songs?????


it takes a good director to understand the angsts, the motivations, the desires and the longings and loneliness of the characters of a script (or a play) and to be able to translate that on screen requires an enormous amount of understanding. sadly, chris columbus is not that kind of a director.

from the visual language itself, one could see just how homophobic the person behind the camera is. songs about same-sex love are filmed so very far and with some stupid element foregrounding in the mise en scene that we don't get to feel the love the couple is expressing (best demonstrated by the song "i'll follow you" about angel the tranny and tom collins the teacher). minsan din mukhang tanga ang filming ng same-sex eksena na you don't get to understand the nuance of what's happening (best exemplified by the "take me or leave me" number kung saan nag-aaway ang lesbian couple maureen and joanne during their engagement dinner! at habang palipat-lipat sila ng lokasyon per stanza e nakatungangang sumusunod lang ang ibang tao sa kanila! nubayun!!!!!!!!!!!!!). the only moments we see the camera capture tenderly the tender moments of couples ay yung sa treatment na sa huli ng hetero couple roger and mimi. pero pag discussions na about people having AIDS and all, nakalayo rin ang camera, except when that montage of roger and april's love story was being montaged, tutok sa tragedy siya, which felt iffy and sensationalistic a la tv patrol of yore. yes, needless to say, puro long shots at wide shots ang pelikulang ito karamihan. buset.

parang sinayang ni columbus ang musicality ng materyal. hindi siya marunong mag-shoot ng isang musical film, that's it. he should learn from the masters. like how WEST SIDE STORY was shot, na kahit napaka-gay minsan ng choreo ng sharks and jets hehe e buo pa rin ang masculinity ng gangs kahit maga-jazz-jazz sila sa kalye ng new york! ito...ewan, ang labo. ang pangit. asar na asar ako kasi original dvd ang binili ko nito!!! pang-pirated lang pala dapat ang kaledad niya. hmp. buset.

kulang sa imagination, e! like how "tango maureen" was interpreted. man, iba attack ko dito kung ako magdidirek nito. ang chaks! ang bland! at heartless. wala talaga siyang compassion sa characters, sa situations nila, sa materyal. parang di niya naiintindihan ang angst ng ganitong klaseng mga tao. sayang. sayan sobra. hay... sayang kasi i really really reaaaaaaaaaaaally love the musical. i watched new voice's staging of this, twice! (the first staging, with monique mooning the audience hehehe was better, yung sa music museum. the second, nawala na ang angst ng roger ni calvin millado, kasi in-love na siya hahaha. ito yung sa gsis theater na)

hay... sayang.


o sya, more movies later.

03 September 2008

PANOORIN SA SABADO: taong lobo naglayag sa lamesa ecopark!

e basta ganun ang drama! minus angel locsin hahaha!

watch na lang kayo. o kung ayaw niyo watch, open your tv to gma7 then sleep again hehehe. it helps in the ratings, men. :P oo ako nagdirek nito!

again, dedma sa time sa pictyur. 930a na po kami, sabado, kapuso network (gma7). LOVELY DAY!!! bago mag-KA-BLOG.




LDFG vs. Halimamaw

Airing on September 6, 2008

Saturday, 9:30 a.m.

Tugak ng Pampanga

Pampanga is known as the “Culinary Capital of the Philippines" because of their mouth-watering dishes. But what makes Kapampangan cooking different from other Pinoy cuisines is their choice of ingredients! They can choose anything under the sun and turn it into savory cuisines. Even frogs!

Host Gabby Roxas tries to catch and cook frogs with Romy Martinez, a supplier of frogs to various restaurants in Pampanga. Because of the numerous rice fields in the province, several frog species have thrived in the area, giving farmers the opportunity to invent various dishes using this amphibian. There’s Betute Tugak or fried frog stuffed with ground pork, and the town’s specialty, Tinolang Palaka. Gabby gets to taste these succulent yet extremely exotic dishes this Saturday!

Puppet festival

Meanwhile, host Love AƱover witnesses the first ever Philippine Puppetry Festival at the Cultural Center of the Philippines! Love gets the chance to see special presentations by puppeteers using Marionnettes or string puppets, and watch children’s stories unfold before her eyes through rod puppetry!

Love also meets Ony Carcamo, a professional ventriloquist. He has the ability to control his mouth and voice and make it seem like the puppet is really talking! With the help of Ony, Love tries her hand at ventriloquism. Will she be able to pass as a ventriloquist?!

LDFG vs. Halimamaw

A rumor is spreading: a monster is terrorizing a small town, hunting children and devouring their hearts with his sharp teeth! It’s the mission of the LD Force to find this monster and stop him from further scaring the town!

But how will the LD Force defeat the creature’s monstrous strength and speed if Bea is not with them? Will they have the courage to face Halimawmaw?



jan ka lang halimaawww


some behind the scenes at the pitik section of my multiply.

i am in lurrrrv!

meet. my new girlfriend. jessica clark.















hoo-wee. check her out!



panalo! tasya pantasya itey. laman siya ng pantasya ng tasyang itey hahahaha! chos.


although parang ang simple ng name niya. jessica clark. wengk. so american common.

for a model, dapat may iba siyang namesung.







men hanep sa blood mixtures.


A 23-year-old stunner of British, Indian and Nigerian descent, Clark was raised in a single-parent home in the U.K. At 16, she won a beauty contest, and before you could say "work it," she was strutting on runways from New York to Milan.


devah?

man! and she's an openly out lesbian model ha! and she sounds intelligent.

read the full interview with her here.



pang-graphic novel model ang dating ng lola.

hotness!








yan ang tunay na "ay papi!" hehe unlike that papi character sa lword! chakaness.


some inanitie
s lang before i go to class. hehehe.

man i'm such a dyke.

02 September 2008

men, nagpaparinig ka ba?

tila. ano?


Your horoscopes for
Tuesday September 02, 2008

General Daily Horoscope for everyone

We're more aware of others today and want to take their needs into consideration as we decide what to do. The Libra Moon helps us to remain objective as we try to understand our relationships. Nevertheless, we can already feel the pressure building from tomorrow's conjunction between the Sun and karmic Saturn. The sooner we tie up loose ends, the better off we'll be later on. There's no escaping our responsibilities now and no reason to procrastinate.


Taurus Horoscopes

(Apr 20 - May 20)

Tuesday, Sep 2nd, 2008 -- On one hand you are tempted to evade your work today or, at least, do as little as possible. It's not that you want to mislead anyone; it's just that you may be more motivated to do something joyful than to perform your job duties. But you also know that playing hooky now could land you in a heap of trouble. Go ahead and enjoy yourself, but don't disappoint anyone in the process.



asar.

no, i'm not playing hooky today. wala talaga akong klase (research break) kaya i decided to hole in sana dahil writing break ko naman. wala rin pala. i'm still needed to be there later this afternoon kaya atak na rin. biglang meeting with da boss and may ka-date nga pala akong afam, i forgot. no, it's not what you think. bayot itey, so platonic lang. bayot and bayli. heehee.

oh well...

so much for relaxing.

at ipagpatuloy ang theme song mula kagabi: to the tune of lola madonna's song...

HOLIDAY!
HOLIDAY!
GUSTO KO NANG MAG-HOLIDAY
(HO-LI-DAY)

huwaaaaaaaaaaah.

god. when's the next flight to pluto? para unreachable ako.

*

ay congrats nga pala sa mga friendsheeps na nanalo sa palanca! omengski! otherwise known as lady rommelia hahaha by butch. at si butch din! congrats! pati sino pa. ichi! yey! at si iwa! naks, ikalawang nobela na! sino pa... emman nga pala! congrats sa inyo ni michiko for the script. who else... fellow UP Baguio co-fellow ko, tara sering, congrats. and nadine, fellow PAHL co-workshopper dati. galeng! my former localvibe.com editor chuck syjuco, congrats. pati kay joy cruz din pala, as told by ms linda.

congrats sa lahat!